The Ties That Bind
by JJS4
Summary: Brianna Hawkins never thought it was possible to be happy, fall in love, and live her own life, until a certain Detective came into her life.
1. Chapter 1

**This story is about my OC and Esposito. There are not nearly enough stories out there for Esposito and Ryan. It's a real shame. I love Caskett, don't get me wrong, but Esposito and Ryan deserve some love as well. This is AU. I tried to keep everyone in character.**

**This story couldn't have been completed without the amazingly helpful A.K Hunter. She's very talented and I highly recommend you check out her story, "In My Veins." Also would like to thank wayouttamyleague, she inspired me to write my first Esposito fic. Check out her stories as well :)**

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own are my OC's.**

**Hope you enjoy and feel compelled to review :)**

"When do you get off work, sweetheart?" Rough fingers grazed my hand, causing me to move my hand back. I could almost laugh at him, but I was too tired for that. He was just the latest of the men who tried to hit on me. Although I hated being hit on by guys in their 40's, I thoroughly enjoyed crushing their dirty little fantasies. I figured they deserved the humiliation that they received.

"Ten o' clock. You gonna come get me?" I put on my best sexy voice.

"Oh, I think that can be arranged." He winked.

"Good." I smiled and leaned forward. "My Dad would love to meet you." His smile faded. "He's always interested in meeting the men who try to pick up his 17-year-old daughter." My face went deadpan as he stood up and paid his bill.

"What? No tip?" I called after. His face was bright red as he walked out of the diner.

"Quit scaring away the customers," Dana, my manager ordered coming out of the kitchen.

"Stop allowing assholes into your diner." She rolled her eyes at me.

"Watch your mouth!" I heard my dad call out from behind me.

"That's not possible." I turned around to find my Dad smirking with a man next to him.

"So another asshole?" He asked.

"Yes. I took care of him, but I think Dana here would like for me to sweeten them up."

"You can let them down without embarrassing them. Destroy a man's ego, you destroy his appetite." She smiled before heading back into the kitchen.

"Yeah and apparently his tipping abilities as well." I turned back to Dad. "So? What can I do for you?"

"Two coffees." He smiled.

"What about your friend? Take his the same way?" I asked my eyes flickering to the other man then back to my Dad.

"The names Javier Esposito. I work with your Dad." He introduced himself, holding out his hand.

"You're a detective?"

He nodded dropping his hand back to his side. I wasn't a hand shaker.

"So you look after my Dad?"

"From time to time." He smirked.

"Well you better not let anything happen to him." I crossed my arms in an attempt to show him how serious I was.

"Brianna," My dad said with a firm voice.

"What? I'm just making sure you're being taken care of." I defended myself. I locked eyes with Detective Esposito, "So don't drop your guard when you are with him. Deal?"

"In order for it to be a deal, you'd have to offer me something in return," The Detective said.

Internally, I thought of many things I could offer him, but I was 17 and my Dad was right there.

"Okay, let me put it this way. If you let anything happen to my Dad, I'll make your life a living hell."

Dad shook his head. "Honey, no threatening Detectives."

"Not threatening." I shot the Detective a look. He quickly shifted his eyes from mine. "So, two coffees, black?"

They nodded.

"For here or to go?"

"Here." Dad answered.

"Coming right up."

They walked towards a table, but I could still hear them.

"So does your daughter threaten many detectives?" The Detective asked my dad.

"Only the ones she knows watch my back." Dad replied. I knew from his voice that he was smiling. I brought two cups over.

"Now remember, you don't pay or leave a tip. I mean it!" I wagged my finger at Dad. I turned to my right. "You, however, can feel more than free to leave whatever tip you want." I smiled before turning and walking back behind the counter.

"She's a charmer, Sam." He noted.

"Yeah, she's just like her Dad." I felt eyes on me. Not my Dad's, but the man sitting next to him. I looked up, connecting my eyes to his.

For the first time since meeting him, I realized they were just like mine. I thought dark eyes were boring, until I saw his. They looked anything but boring.

He noticed my glance and stared back down at the table. I would have called him out for being a creeper, but I didn't think that was his intention.

The front door swung open and I noticed that it was the same prick I had just ran out of the diner. What was he coming back for? I grabbed the coffee pot and walked over to my Dad's table. The asshole and I made eye contact.

"The guy who just walked in, is the prick who was hitting on me before you showed up." I said under my breath.

They both picked up on it as I pretended to refill their cups. I turned away and walked back behind the counter. I was kind of wanted the prick to say something or try something, maybe he'd get the hint if dad said something to him.

"What can I get you?" I asked walking closer.

"You can get me an hour of your time, preferably in the backseat of my car." I smiled knowing both men heard what he had just said.

"Didn't I tell you I was 17?"

"Maybe I don't believe you. I mean, what kind of 17-year-old works at diner in the middle of the day?"

"This one does," I sighed. "So please stop trying to jump my bones and leave."

"Or?"

'Thank you, God!'

"Or my friends will make you leave." I glanced over to the table. Both men had smug looks on their faces.

"Who are they?" The prick asked.

"Well, the one on the right is an NYPD detective and so is the other one, but he is also my dad," I smiled.

The prick looked over and Detective Esposito threw a wave his way, while flashing his badge. 'Nice touch.' I thought. Upon seeing the badge, the prick stood up and quickly left, avoiding eye contact with everyone. It was sad to see men like that. I mean, he could be married. He could have kids. I shook my head.

"Thanks guys," I called over.

"For what? We didn't have to get rough with him."

"You sound disappointed." I observed.

"Maybe a little," He smirked. "Get a little uneasy when I don't get to take down guys, especially the ones who hit on minors." He joked.

"Sorry, I was hoping you could too." I said before turning to Dad, who was looking down at his phone. I heard a sigh escape.

"What is it?" I asked placing my hand on his shoulder.

"Katie got sick at school."

"She did?" I was surprised. "She's never sick."

He grabbed his jacket off the back of the chair. "You mind staying here while I go outside and call my sister?" He asked the Detective.

"No problem man."

I kind of felt like I should be doing something. Like maybe I could leave work and then bring Katie here, she could do homework here, right? Or maybe I could stay home with her. Dana wouldn't want Katie possibly infecting costumers. My eyes darted to the man staring at me and I noticed him squinting. Almost like he was trying hard to read my thoughts.

"Hey, Dad. I can watch her."

"Bri, you're working."

"Yeah, but I don't think Dana will mind, if you go use your charm on her." I raised my eyebrows. Dana had a soft spot for my Dad and almost everyone knew it.

"Are you sure?"

I nodded immediately. "I think aunt Carmen is working anyways."

"Alright, thanks kid." He patted my shoulder and smiled as he walked past me to find Dana.

"Did your mother ever tell you it's not nice to stare at people?" I asked, turning to him.

"Sorry. I just don't think I've ever ran across someone like you. Are you sure you aren't older?"

I laughed. Why did everyone ask me that? "Nope. I'm just a 17-year-old. That's it. Nothing special I assure you."

He stared at me in amusement. "I don't know about that."

"What part?" I questioned.

"The special part."

Before I could reply, Dad came back out. "Alright kiddo, you're riding with us."

"Let me go lock my things up in the back first, okay?"

He nodded, while he and the detective got up.

Katie looked like she was going the throw up when we got to her school. Her cheeks were so pale and her eyes were red from where she had been crying.

I felt her head when we got back into Dad's cruiser. "Damn sis. You're burning up. Been kissing any sick guys I need to go talk to?" I tried a joke, but it didn't work on her. She must be really sick.

"I feel like I am going to die."

"Yeah, well you're not, so don't worry." I placed my hand on hers. "Remember last summer when I caught the flu and was held up for two weeks?" She nodded. "I thought I was never going to feel better again, but look at me now. I know this sucks, but soon you'll feel better. We all get sick."

"Not me."

She had me there. Katie never got sick, well, she did, but not very often.

"I know, maybe this is just a 24-hour bug and it's just working its way through your system. I'm sure you'll be better by tomorrow, and if you aren't, I'll take care of you." I squeezed her hand while she laid her head on my shoulder.

"Really? You'll make me soup and put a cool wash cloth on my forehead?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not Mrs. Brady, but I will make sure you don't die."

"Thanks." She replied dryly.

"Don't mention it." I smiled. I caught the Detective's eyes on me as we stopped at a light.

When we pulled up the house, Dad shot out of the car and rushed over to get Katie. He was really protective when we were sick. It didn't matter what our age was. I unbuckled her while Dad threw her book bag over his shoulder and walked her up to the house. I shook my head. She was 14, not 6.

"It was nice meeting you, Brianna."

"Same here, Detective."

"Call me Javi."

"Okay." I nodded. "Remember, don't let anything happen to my Dad." I narrowed my eyes and noticed him swallow.

He turned around in his seat. "I promise."

I believed him. "Good, cause you seem like a cool guy and I'd really hate to have to kill you Javi." I said before getting out of the car.

* * *

><p><strong><span>Javi's POV<span>**

She threatened me. Actually threatened me. I still couldn't wrap my head around it. Of course I knew why she did it, but not too many people had threatened me. Especially petite 17 year old girls. I sat there for about 10 minutes, before Sam returned. As soon as he got in the car, I couldn't help it, I had to say something.

"Your daughter is something else. She threatened my life."

A small smile covered Sam's face. "That's my girl."

"Brianna looks a lot like you, but where in the hell did the red hair come from?"

"Her mother."

I didn't say anything more, because well, even I knew Sam's wife was a sore subject and I wasn't about to make him mad.

I didn't know much about what happened. Just that his wife left when the girls were pretty young, leaving Sam to raise them. He didn't talk about his wife all that much, not that I could blame him, he probably wanted to try his best to just forget her.

I had known Sam for awhile now and I had a hard time believing someone would just leave him. Who could leave their family like that?

"We should get back to the precinct." Sam said checking his watch.

I simply nodded.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews!**

**A Few Weeks Later**

"What do you want to do? Go to the Zoo? See a movie?" I tried. I wasn't very good at planning things for us to do. I usually left it up to dad, but he was at work, so today plans fell in my lap. I wanted to get out if the house and go somewhere, anywhere.

"I don't know. Maybe I should just stay here and do homework." She said, picking up her book bag.

"What?" What was wrong with her? "You're telling me you want to spend the rest of the day in your room doing math homework?" Just thinking about it made me feel sad for her.

She nodded.

"Where are you from?"

She sighed. "It's not a big deal, I just don't feel like doing anything. Aren't you working today, anyways?"

"Nope. Dana recently hired a new guy, so my hours are getting switched up. But don't change the subject. Why don't you want to get out and enjoy the day?"

She threw her bag on the kitchen table. "Just stupid teenager problems. If people told me being a teenager was so confusing, I would have tried to enjoy my preteens a lot more." She sighed and sat at the table pulling two textbooks in front of her. "Just go somewhere without me."

"Okay, we need to talk." I grabbed a jar of peanut butter from the pantry and then two spoons. She eyed me curiously until I sat down across from her. "Here," I slid over a spoon and opened the jar, before sliding it to the center of the table. "Start from the beginning." I dipped my spoon in the peanut butter. 'Peanut butter fixes every problem.' Or that's what dad always told us. I think he just used it as an excuse, knowing full well Katie and I loved peanut butter and that we were a lot more likely to open up to him.

Turned out my little sister got into a fight with her best friend. I tried my best to help her understand that it wasn't the end of the world, but I couldn't stop her from being sad. In fact, I think the peanut butter helped more than I did.

The important thing was that I got her to open up to me and she was now willing leave the house. After an hour of debating where to go, we finally decided on the Zoo. We both loved animals very dearly, even though we were never allowed to have pets growing up. With dad at work and Katie and I at school, it didn't really makes sense to have a pet.

Dad took us to the zoo a lot when we were growing up. I think he took us because it was the only place he knew he could bring us and we would be too distracted to run around like maniacs.

* * *

><p>We were only there 10 minutes before ending up staring at the Penguins. We always spent the most time there. There was something about those Penguins that always made us run for them and then just watch. Maybe it was because they were so peaceful and organized, unlike our life. Being the daughters of not only a single father, but also a father who was a Homicide Detective, was anything but relaxing. We stood there for a long time just looking at the Penguins interact and swim with each other. Something about it calmed us.<p>

Dad brought us here as much as he could after mom ditched us. He tried his best to take care us. To spend time with us. We would go to the Zoo, park, football and baseball games. Anywhere he thought we might have fun. I smiled thinking of dad. He tried so hard to make us happy, but all we cared about was being with him. Especially me. I was old enough to remember when we were ditched. Katie had absolutely no memories of Mom. I kind of envied her for that.

"Brianna?" I heard from behind us. I jerked around wondering who it could be. Nobody knew we were here. I saw a hand waving and saw that it belonged to Kevin Ryan, who wasn't alone.

"Hi!" I waved back. There we were two idiots waving at each other. I grabbed Katie's hand and pulled her with me as I walked over to him.

"Hey what are you doing here? Got the day off?" He asked with a smile.

"Yeah. Work hours are getting shifted around, so I am working tonight instead. Katie had a half day at school." I gestured to the now nervous girl next to me. "This is my sister Katie."

"Hey Katie. I'm Kevin Ryan." He held out his hand and she shook it.

"He works with dad." I filled her in, looking at her. Was she blushing?

"Yeah, I would say I protect him, but it works the other way around."

I smiled. "Dad protects him from Javi." I encouraged.

"And I am thankful for it everyday." Kevin smiled.

He must have noticed my eyes darting between him and the pretty blonde, holding his hand.

"Brianna, Katie, this is Jenny. Jenny, these are the daughters of my partner Sam," He introduced us. "you met him the same day as Javi, remember?"

She nodded then looked towards us. "Nice to meet you both." She spoke up, but seemed shy, much like Katie always was.

"Nice to meet you too." I greeted with a smile, hoping to make her feel more comfortable.

"Sam here?" Kevin asked, looking around.

"No." I shook my head. "Just us."

"Great minds think alike." He commented.

"Well, we will let you guys get back to enjoying your day." I said not wanting to take up their time. They had to be on a date. He nodded in thanks.

"It was good seeing you guys. We'll have to stop by the diner soon."

"That'd be great." I smiled.

"It's was nice meeting you Katie." Kevin said to her and I noticed her cheeks were bright red.

"You too." She shyly smiled.

After we all said goodbye, Katie and I were back to watching Penguins. I didn't want to embarrass her, but I just had to know. I wanted to do it carefully though.

"Weird meeting the guys dad works with, huh?" I asked.

She nodded, giving me nothing.

"Remember Javi?"

"How could I forget?"

"Who knew NYC had a collection of attractive homicide detectives, huh?" I nudged her elbow.

"What?" She asked.

"Come on!" I groaned. "You can't tell me you didn't find Kevin attractive."

"A little. Maybe." She sputtered.

I smiled and decided to let it go for now. I didn't want her getting mad at me, that wasn't what to day was about.

I was surprised that Kevin noticed me. I had only met him a couple times at the diner. Javi would always talk about Kevin as his partner in crime, his bro for life, but I was a little surprised when I met him. Kevin was just so different than how I imagined him being.

I guess I was imagining a clone of Javi, but Kevin was anything but. From what I knew about him, he was conscientious, a bit naive, and a little quirky. All adorable traits, but Javi was the complete opposite, which made it very difficult to see how they could be so in sync with each other, like Javi had talked about.

Kevin was fun to talk to and even more fun to listen to. He was smart, so he knew little facts about an array of topics, he had all best stories, usually involving Javi and he getting caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. Kevin was honest, much to Javi's dismay. He was even honest when it was about something that made him look bad. I had to respect that. He made it easy to like him.

I was beginning to get closer to Javi. He was actually a pretty relaxed guy. I didn't feel awkward around him, like some of the other Detectives that dad would introduce Katie and I to. Javi was basically an older version of me. He liked playing video games and The Walking Dead. Katie and dad hated zombies of any type, so it was nice to finally have someone there to understand my obsession and didn't mock it like Katie always did.

We spent the rest of our afternoon talking and walking through the Zoo. We decided to bring dad for his birthday next year. He would love it, seeing as how he really didn't have much time for going to the Zoo anymore.

We understood his plight, we just didn't always like it. We knew he didn't like it either, but that's how life worked sometimes.

"So do you think they are together?" Katie interrupted my thoughts.

"Who?"

"That guy dad works with and that woman."

"Oh, um," I looked at her with a small smirk settling on my face. "You jealous?" I teased.

"Don't be ridiculous!" She snapped and a light blush fell over his features. I almost laughed.

"Afraid so. They look cute together huh?" I teased.

"That's mean. How would you feel if we saw Javi walking around with someone as pretty as that woman was?"

Wow. Where'd that come from? "Uh," I was confused. "I don't know. Why would it bother me?"

"I see that look whenever his name is mentioned." She raised her eyebrows.

She was turning the tables on me? I didn't know if I should be upset or proud. She was usually pretty passive when it came to personal situations. It was times like this, that she reminded me of dad. Dad never shied away from calling people out. Especially his daughters. Looked like she really was one of us after all.

"We should get home." I didn't respond to her comment. "I have to make dinner for dad, before I head off to work." I turned and walked toward the exit. I heard her running to catch up with me.

"See? It's not fun to tease people, huh?" She made her point with a smug facial expression.

I groaned, but smiled. I couldn't stay mad at her. I still didn't know why she would think I was attracted to Javi? I was, but not to the point of where I would get jealous. I shook my head. I didn't have a stupid childish crush on Javi. Not at all.

**Thanks for reading! Please review or PM anytime :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter was maybe the most nerve racking. Lots of tense scenes ahead. Hope you enjoy!**

Over the past couple weeks things had changed for me and I wasn't sure what to do. A new guy, Derek, had asked me out recently and I wasn't too sure what to do about it. I wasn't sure if it was a good idea or not. I had a lot of other things on my mind. Katie. Dad. Work. Goals. Did I really have time to get involved with anyone?

Derek and I worked together and we also worked the same hours, so it wasn't as if I could avoid him. I just had to try my best to deflect until I decided if it was a good idea.

I knew dad and Katie would approve of it. They were always pushing me to do things for myself. They never intentionally tried to hold me back. I was pretty skilled at doing that all by myself. I didn't really have many people in my life that I could call friends. At least not in my age range. I had a best friend growing up, but that was quickly ended after I got hurt playing at her house. I had a few friends in school, but as soon as I dropped out, we no longer saw each other.

Sometimes it didn't bother me living in a bubble of family and work, but there was another part of me that wanted to be like everyone else. I wanted school, lots of friends, and boyfriends, but I couldn't do that I couldn't just be that person. Could I? I couldn't have that life and the one I was already living.

"I'm headed out," Derek informed walking into the kitchen. "need a ride?"

"No thanks." I smiled.

"You sure? It's kind of cold out there."

"I'll be fine. Thanks for the offer though." I slipped on my jacket and did another scan of the kitchen, making sure everything was turned off and put in it's proper place.

"Alright." He sighed. "Have a good night."

"See ya." I said watching him leave. He wasn't unattractive. He was maybe 5'10, brown hair, blue eyes, modest build. I couldn't see anything wrong with him. He was always really sweet and helpful to me. I just couldn't allow myself to make a move with him, for some reason. He made it clear he was interested in me. What would be the harm?

I finished my checklist for the kitchen and began to lock up. Dana, with a certain degree of hesitation, allowed me to start closing. I knew why she was worried. I would most likely be alone and someone could try to rob the place, but after weeks of countless begging from me, she gave in and finally allowed it. I hadn't screwed up once and I could see in her eyes that she was impressed, even if she would never say it out loud.

While walked out, I saw Javi leaning against the front of the diner. His head hung down almost as if he was asleep. I noticed his eyes were closed and I stood there for awhile to see if he would move, but I didn't see any movement besides his breathing.

I had two choices, one, I could wake him up nice and slowly, or two, I could scare the hell out of him. A smile covered my face. It might be mean to scare him, but I couldn't pass up this opportune moment. I had a feeling he would do the same if he were in my shoes.

I looked around to make sure nobody was around and prayed Javi wouldn't immediately draw his weapon and fire.

I charged forward and jerked his arms. "WAKE UP!" I yelled. Immediately his eyes popped open connected with mine. He backed away and grabbed his chest as I giggled into my hand.

He took a few steps back. "What the hell?" He asked still holding his hand to his chest.

"Wow. I expected so much more from you Detective Esposito." I joked while laughing.

"You're lucky, I'm not carrying heat." He pointed his finger at me. "I hate you." He muttered walking past me.

"Aw. Come on," I laughed and followed after him. "I was just playing around." I nudged his arm with mine.

"Next time I will drop you."

"Only if you want to be dropped as well."

"By you?" He asked obviously amused.

"No. By dad." I smiled.

"Oh yeah." He muttered. "I'm sure Sam would understand." He joked.

I smiled as we continued walking down the street.

For the past couple weeks I would find either dad or Javi waiting for me after work. I knew why dad would be there. He was a worried single father. At first I wasn't sure why Javi was waiting there, but I pieced it together fairly quickly. I was pretty sure dad had put pressure on Javi to come by on the nights he couldn't.

"Who was that guy wearing the Yankee's hat?" Javi asked breaking the silence.

"What guy?"

"Coming out of the diner?"

I racked my brain. "Oh that was Derek."

"He a new guy?"

"Fairly new." I answered and rubbed my arms trying to and keep warm.

"You like him?" He asked.

"What's it to you?" I asked with subtle bitterness.

"Just asking." He smiled. I sighed and keep rubbing my arms.

"He asked me out." I offered.

"He did?"

I nodded.

"Good. What did you say?"

"I told him that I had to use the restroom and walked away."

Javi stopped me and made me face him.

"Why would you do that?"

I shrugged. "Not sure I really need a boyfriend right now Javi."

He shook his head, not in agreement to what I had said, but just at me in general. "It's okay to do your own thing, nobody will think less of you. Katie will still be taken care of and I've got your dad covered, so you don't need to let it stop you."

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"Think about it, okay?"

"Why?"

"Because I would actually like to see you happy from time to time. Maybe Mr. Yankee's Hat can help with that."

"I'm happy." I tried to defend myself.

"You're content, not happy. Trust me, I know the difference." He muttered as we turned down my street.

"I'll think about it." I said, causing a smile to spread across his face.

* * *

><p><strong><span>Javi's POV<span>**

**A Few Days Later**

"Did we get the results back from ballistics?" Ryan asked coming back from the break room.

"Not yet. Shouldn't be too long." I yawned. I hadn't gotten much sleep lately.

"You know what I just saw in the break room?" Ryan's toned had changed.

"Coffee machine? Tables? Chairs?" I guessed making my sarcasm seep through.

"Funny." He said dryly. "I just saw Castle and Beckett." His eyebrows shot up.

"Hold the phone! You mean you actually saw Beckett and Castle in the precinct? Wow. That's weird. Almost like they work here or something." I widened my eyes in mocked shock.

He sighed. "I mean I walked in and they were standing pretty close to each other. Like staring in each others eyes. Once they knew I was there, they broke away pretty quick." He had a smug smile on his face. I rolled my eyes. Sometimes he was like a teenage girl when it came to gossip.

"Yeah?" He nodded. "Close? Like how we are right now?" He looked down and noticed how far he was leaned over in his chair. He backed away and his smile faded. "Bro, I think you grasping at straws here."

"Really?"

I sighed. "Okay, maybe Castle has a thing for her, but I hardly think its mutual on Beckett's side."

He nodded. "Probably right." He turned back to his desk, while I just shook my head.

Ever since Castle had begun, for a lack of a better term, working with us, Ryan has been on his trail. Maybe it was a protective thing. I mean I would protect Beckett if I thought Castle was anything less than a good guy, but we knew him. Castle was harmless, despite what he made his fictional killers do.

"Guys!" Beckett voice rang out and I spun around in my chair. "We just got a call of an officer down."

* * *

><p><strong><span>Brianna's POV<span>**

"So you're saying that there is nothing. No memories?" Katie asked.

"There are memories." Just none worth mentioning.

"Like what?" She pressed. "I don't know anything. I've only seen a few pictures."

"There's not much to tell." I was starting to get uncomfortable. She probably wasn't going to let this go, but I wasn't going to make it easy for her.

"You were five, there has to be something you know or remember."

"What's with the recently curiosity?"

We never talked about her. There was no need to. She wasn't worth wasting words on. Katie knew Dad and I didn't feel comfortable talking about her.

"Jason."

"Jason?" Her boyfriend?

"Yeah." She nodded. "He was asking me about our family and I told him what little I know about her and it just got me thinking."

"Like I said, there's not much to tell." I started to squirm.

"Come on, whatever you know is good enough for me."

I rubbed my neck and stood up. I took a deep breath. "Katie, lets not do this."

"This?" She asked. "This is Mom."

I shook my head. Why did we need to talk about her? I didn't want to do this.

"No. I don't want to talk about her!" I yelled causing Katie to jump. "I'm sorry, it's just I don't like thinking about it, let alone talking about her. You know what happened."

"Only what Dad has told me."

"He told you everything."

She shook her head. "No he didn't. I was 8 when I asked. He was holding back."

I shook my head. "I don't want to talk about it okay, so just ask him when he gets home." I pleaded.

She sighed. "This so unfair!"

"Unfair?"

"Yes. You are keeping things from me, but you expect me to be upfront with you about everything. Why can't you just be honest with me?"

I couldn't take this. I couldn't take the questions and demands. I grabbed my jacket. "You have no idea what unfair is!" I walked to the door. "I have to go."

"Bri!" She called after me.

"Just stay here until Dad gets home!" I yelled before leaving. Once I was outside and the cool air hit my face, I felt a lot better. I was hoping the walk to work would help calm me down. I didn't really need to be to work, but I needed a reason to get out of there. My heart was beating really fast and I was feeling sick. I took a breath. I felt bad for yelling at Katie, but she was being difficult.

She knew I didn't like talking about her. Why did she bring her up? Why would she want to know about her? She shouldn't be concerned about her. She should just worry about herself, not some bitch who gave up on her. On all of us.

I took another breath. Each thought was getting me more and more worked up. Sometimes, when I allowed myself to think about it, I got anxious and it would take a while for me to calm down. That's why thinking and talking about it, was something I rarely did.

Tonight I didn't need to think about anything. Tonight was supposed to be fun and not anything less.

Tonight was my first date with Derek and I was off to a hell of a start.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Kevin's POV<strong>

There were certain things one just had to accept when thinking about becoming a cop. I had come to terms that I could be killed at any moment. I mean I was trained to prevent it, but I still knew being a cop raised my chances of not living long enough to get married or have children. As cops, we all knew this. Even though I knew it and accepted it, it didn't make things an easier when you saw one of your own laying on the ground with a gun wound to the head. Even though I had seen dead bodies on a regular basis and talked with many family members of countless victims, I still was overcome with fear and shock. Standing there watching those ambulance doors close, I felt a surge of nausea take over.

"What now?" I asked Javi as the ambulance pulled away. I didn't get any answer for awhile. His eyes were staring straight forward, watching the ambulance pull away. I knew he was just as fearful as I was. Despite what we had seen when we first got to the crime scene, we both knew that wasn't the hardest part of it. We had broken the news to families before, but this time it was a little too close to home.

"We need to go. We have to tell them." I heard sniffle before he walked away towards the cruiser.

I put my head down. How were we going to do this?

* * *

><p><span><strong>Brianna's POV<strong>

Derek was a lot more open now with me, now that we were out of the diner. He was funny and had a certain level of charm. He was almost nothing at all like the person I worked with. We spent most the walk to my house talking about everything. Mostly movies and music.

Surprisingly, I found myself having a good time. I spent most of the walk smiling and laughing. He shared some stories from his childhood and I did the same. I left out the personal details. He didn't need to know about that.

"So? Can we do this again? Maybe next time we can go bowling or something?" He looked awfully nervous. We rounded the corner and walked down my sidewalk.

Instincts told me to say no, but I ignored them, thinking about Javi. He was right. Having my own life didn't make me selfish. It didn't make me love my family any less.

"I'd like that." I answered quietly.

"Good." He smirked. As we approached the house I noticed Javi standing against the side of his car. I narrowed my eyes making sure if it was actually him, or if the dark was deceiving me.

"Hey, I think I have seen that guy at the diner." Derek said. He must have noticed me looking at him.

"Yeah. That's Javi. He works with my dad. He's a family friend."

He nodded. "Well I should let you go." He stopped his pace and I did the same.

"Yeah. Thanks for tonight. I had fun." I smiled.

"Me too." He looked down at our feet. "I'll see tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah, I work the night shift."

"Alright, well I'll see you then."

Awkwardness filled the air. "See ya." I said before reaching up and giving him a hug. He hugged me back.

He moved back. "Goodnight."

"Night." I waved before he turned around and walked away.

I felt eyes on me and suddenly I remembered who was there with me. I turned around and started walking towards him. He should be happy. I took his advice.

"Hey!" I approached him.

He pushed himself off the car and pulled me to him wrapping me into a hug. I was more than a little taken aback. I had no idea why he was hugging me. I had no context to follow. For a moment, a long moment, I hugged him back. No words. Just hugging him.

He slowly pulled away and I saw his eyes. They made me jump. They looked different and he looked exhausted. Sometimes dad looked exhausted, but not as bad as Javi did.

Things must have been really bad today. I had never seen Javi look that way. He always had a smile. I needed to know what was wrong, but I felt a small urge to just let it go. I shook the feeling.

"Javi? Are you okay?" I asked.

He looked at me, but quickly looked at the ground. He was strangely quiet. Why didn't he want to talk? Why was he here if he wasn't planning to talk? What was that hug about?

"Javi, what is it?" I needed to know. Being silent wasn't an option for me. "Is everything okay? Did something happen?"

He shook his head. "Can we talk in my car?" He spoke, but it was barely a whisper.

"Um...sure?" I followed him to his car in more silence. He opened the door for me. Something residing in me, wanted to just leave. Leave him there. Something told me not knowing was a hell of a lot better than what he had to tell me was. I shook my head and stayed. Maybe Javi needed me. That would explain the hug. He was reaching out.

It seemed like he was dragging his feet getting to the other side of the car. Under certain circumstances, I might think he was going to break up with me. He had that look of regret and hurt written all over his face.

When he got in the car, I heard him release a sigh.

"So..." I trailed.

He looked out the windshield. "I have something to tell you and it isn't going to be easy." He still wouldn't look at me, which made me believe him.

"What is it? Is Kevin okay?"

He nodded. "He's okay."

I nodded. Well I knew it had nothing to do with Katie. If it had to with Katie, dad would be here, not Javi. I exhaled at that thought. Dad. Did it have to do with Dad?

"Javi, what is it?"

"Earlier today," He stopped and finally looked at me. "We got a call of a shooting that took place." His voice was a lot huskier than usual, indicating he was having trouble. "It was..." I saw his eyes moisten.

"Javi." I stopped him. "Is he okay?" I breathed out. I felt my stomach starting to flip. This wasn't good. "I mean if he was shot, you can tell me, I won't freak out." I wouldn't. I just needed to know that he would be okay.

He nodded. "Yes, he was."

I nodded and exhaled again. "Okay. Well is he okay? Are you here to take me to see him?" I wasn't going to let my emotions get the best of me. Not in front of Javi.

He looked away again. Why wasn't he looking at me? Realization hit me when I saw the tears start to gather in his eyes. I shook my head. "No." I simply said. That wasn't true. It wasn't possible. I kept trying to process it, but nothing made sense. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't.

"Bri," He started, but I shook my head. I couldn't focus on him right now. It was like trying to solve an unsolvable math equation. Nothing was adding up.

"How?"

"We don't know much as of right now. All we know is that he was alone."

"Alone? No. Why would he be alone?"

"We don't know."

"This doesn't make sense." I shook my head and opened the door.

"What are you doing?"

"I need air." I got out of the car, feeling like I might faint if I stayed in. Everything was getting blurry and hot. I leaned against the car and ran my hands through my hair. This whole thing was getting out of hand. Why wasn't anything making sense? I grabbed my phone out of my pocket. I was going to get to the bottom of this.

Out of nowhere Javi appeared in front of me. "Who are you calling? Katie?"

"I'm calling dad." I replied but couldn't get an answer. Where was he? Where was Katie?

"Bri," Javi grabbed my hands, but I pulled them back and tried the number again. "you aren't going to get an answer."

"You'll see."

Two hands grabbed my wrists. "I'm so sorry. I wish more than anything I didn't have to tell you this. I wish it wasn't true, but it is."

Tears starting to come back I swallowed my emotions. "I'm fine. He's going to call and tell me everything is okay."

"No." He shook his head. "He isn't."

"Don't say that!" I screamed. It was getting harder and harder to stop the tears. "It's not true!"

"I'm so sorry." A tear slid down his cheek. This wasn't a joke.

I shook my head and succumbed, letting the tears come. Javi's arms wrapped around me and pulled me close to him. I had dreams like this before, about getting that news, but this was so much worse than I could have ever imagined. I buried my face into his chest and broke down.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Javi's POV<strong>

I had told many people that someone they loved was dead. I thought I was good at it after year of doing it, but I guess I was wrong. Or maybe this time was different. Different because this time it was personal. This time it affected me as well.

Beckett had offered to take the wheel when it came to telling Bri and Katie, but Kevin and I decided it would better if they heard it from us. I was beginning to question that as I felt Bri's body shaking under my hands. I didn't know what to do.

Nothing I could say would make her feel better. Nothing could make the hurt go away. All I could do in this moment was be there for her. I would stand here as long as she needed me to. I would always be there for her and Katie. I needed to be, not only because I cared about them, but because I wasn't there for Sam, when I should have been. Like I promised Bri I would be.

**Please review, would love to know what you think :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, so I am jumping the story forward, so that the plot can start to work its way in. Hope it isn't too jarring. **

**Four Years Later**

I was brought out of my nightmare by the obnoxious ringtone I set, specifically for Javi. I was almost grateful for his call. The nightmare was of a masked person chasing Katie and I through the woods. I kept pushing Katie to move faster, but the masked person was just too fast. As their hand reached the hood of my jacket, I heard the phone. I groaned rolling over and taking my phone and unhooking it from the charger.

"What?" I answered. Not really annoyed with Javi, but of the reoccurring nightmare.

"Morning sleeping beauty! You can at least try and act happy to hear from me."

I rolled my eyes. "To what do I owe for the pleasure of your time?" I tried to cheer up my voice.

"Not too bad, but it needs some work."

"So?"

"What are you and Katie doing today?"

"Don't know. It's Saturday, so probably nothing." I yawned.

"Well, you have plans now." He said with a high level of certainty. "You guys are coming with Kev and I to a game."

I stretched out. "What?"

"There's a game and we're going, no and's, if's, or but's about it."

I looked at the clock. _Eight in the morning! _

I groaned. "Why in the hell are you calling so early?"

"To inform you of our plans. Aren't you listening?"

Why? Why did I have to deal with this? Was I a puppy torturer in a past life or something?

"You couldn't have done that at noon?"

"Yes, but I also wanted to call to make sure you didn't sleep this beautiful day away." His voice was awfully chipper.

I groaned. "Don't you have a life?"

"Yes and you just happen to be in it."

"Yay me!" I faked excitement. He had to see that coming.

I heard a chuckle. "Let Katie know, okay?"

"That you're a jerk? Think she already knows." I let my eyes close, when keeping them opened became a struggle.

"You love me and you know it."

"Okay, I will let her know." I yawned again. "Are we done now?"

"Yes, ma'am. I'll see you at 5."

"Bye."

"Don't you dare go back to sleep, chica!" I heard him call out as I hung up.

I shook my head and rolled over covering my head with the blanket. Why did I let Javi have my number? Did I like punishment?

I didn't know why he was taking Katie and I to a game. Last time Katie complained the whole time, because it was too hot and she got mustard on her jeans. The whole day turned out to be a bust after that.

Why did we have to suffer through hours of Javi and Kevin debating MVPs, stats, and who would be first to make pro between the two of them? I loved them, but sometimes, it was hard to believe that they really spent most of their days and nights as detectives.

I groaned when I realized sleep wouldn't be coming back anytime soon.

"I hate you, Javier Esposito." I muttered while looking at my ceiling.

After a few minutes of being in denial of having to start the day, I rolled out of bed and went to the kitchen. I knocked on Katie's door on my way. "Rise and shine!"

No matter how many times I tried to shake the feeling that damn nightmare had caused, I couldn't. Sometimes I felt doomed after having those dreams. What did they mean?

After eating a bowl of cereal and chugging down a glass of Orange Juice, Katie walked out of her room, looking half alive.

"Morning sunshine!" I greeted with too much enthusiasm.

"Why am I awake?"

I jumped off the kitchen counter putting my bowl in the sink. "I got a wake up call from Javi and couldn't go back to sleep. I didn't want to be alone."

She rolled her eyes and pressed her forehead against the wall. "I hate Javi!" She groaned.

"Hey! That's what I said!" She jumped a little, so I decided to lowered my voice. "Why are you so moody? Usually you are more chipper in the morning."

"Didn't get to sleep til around 4."

"Why not?"

"I don't know. I couldn't get comfortable. I tried everything I could think of, but nothing worked, I guess my body gave in and I drifted off."

"I'm sorry."

"I have a question." She said looking at me. "Have you ever had the feeling like you are being watched?"

I gave her a weird look. "Are you drunk or high?"

"I'm being serious."

I shook my head. "I work at a diner and almost always have eyes on me. Sorry."

She shook her head and walked by me heading for the cereal box. "It was probably nothing." She muttered pouring a bowl.

"Lack of sleep really does throw you off your game." I observed. "So Javi called and said that we are all going to a game tonight." I was a little concerned about what her reaction would be.

She poured her milk and gave me a look.

"We?"

"Javi, Kevin, you, and me."

She nodded. "Okay."

I did a double take. "Really? You are agreeing just like that?"

"Yes. Why wouldn't I?"

"Last time..."

"That was last time. I'm not going to let one bad experience ruin... the chance to have fun."

That was doubtful.

I nodded. "Maybe it has more to do with a certain person."

"Like?"

"Nothing." I muttered. She knew I was lying.

She finished her cereal."I'm going to take a shower and try and wake myself up some more."

"Alright. I'll be here."

* * *

><p>I washed our dirty dishes, not liking that they were just sitting there. I always did that. I guess it was a bit of a habit now. Even if it was just a plate and a cup, I needed to wash it. I couldn't leave it just sitting there. Working at the diner, made me sort of OCD about things like that.<p>

When I got done with that. I went to my room deciding to clean. These days were usually mine and Katie's lazy ones. They were usually reserved for cleaning the apartment and studying. I recently began studying to get my GED. My new boss James said, I could only become manager, if I had, at the very least, my GED.

It was going along pretty good. I was shocked by how much I still remembered. Kevin pitched in with teaching the stuff I hadn't learned. I was seriously regretting the decision to drop out. Dad told me I would, but like usual I thought I knew best. Technically, I didn't need to drop out, but I decided to anyways. Mostly because I thought me having a job would be more beneficial than being stuck in school for 6 hours. I knew extra money, no matter how very little that was, would be helpful. It was helpful, but I still regretted not graduating.

I walked over to my nightstand and put dad's chain around my neck. After he was gone and we got back his personal items, I took the chain he had always worn since before I could remember, and wore it almost everyday. I took it off when I showered and when I slept. I guess having it with me made me feel safe.

Not that having Javi and Kevin hover over us incessantly, didn't make me feel safe, it was just that wearing the chain made me feel closer to dad. Katie, on the other hand, didn't want anything, but his watch. She never wore it. She just kept it in her jewelry box. She was very closed off when it came to dad, not that I really blamed her. I didn't talk about him with anyone.

Hearing a bump in the living room, I turned around ready to go see if Katie was okay. As soon as I walked out of my bedroom door, I saw a shadow of someone, then saw only black.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Javi's POV<strong>

"I don't get it. I just don't get it." I said to Beckett and Castle.

"I wouldn't be worried. You guys are practically brothers. He's probably just swamped with the planning." Beckett tried to reassure me, but I was still curious. Why hadn't he said anything?

"I don't know. He hasn't even given me any sign of planning a bachelor party. He knows I will be all on top of that." Why hadn't asked me to be his best man?

"Maybe you should go to him?" Castle suggested before taking a drink of coffee.

"You think?" I asked. That sounded doable.

"Yeah. I mean, if Beckett's right and he is just too busy with everything, bringing it up, might take some stress off of him."

I nodded. "Makes sense." I said. "I mean I can just let him know that I will get everything planned and he doesn't have to lift a finger." I prepped myself. "All he has to do is show up."

Castle snapped his fingers. "There you go."

"Am I not the greatest best man in history!"

"Say we are going to Vegas and I will be more than happy to scream it from the mountain tops."

I looked over to see Beckett rolling her eyes. "Technically you aren't a best man, yet." Beckett reminded me.

"Javi!" I heard from the bullpen. I stepped out of the break room walking towards Kev.

"What's up?"

"We gotta go. Officer Jensen just called. He's at Bri and Katie's place." Kev was throwing his jacket on.

"What? Why?"

"There was a break in. That's all I know."

I immediately grabbed my jacket off the back of my chair. "A break in? They okay?"

"He says they are a little shaken up, but fine. He thought we would want to know."

I nodded. "Let's go." I said, walking to the elevators. I only had one thing on my mind. Bri.

When we entered the apartment, we had to stop mid stride. Was this a joke? Everything looked normal. Nothing looked out of place. Except Katie. She was sitting on the couch. Her legs folded and her face in her hands. I glanced around, but didn't see Bri.

"Katie?" Kev walked over and I followed.

"Kev? Javi?" She said getting up and giving us both a hug. "Thank God you are here."

"What happened?" Kev and I asked at the same time.

She took a deep breath. "I was in the shower, so I didn't see anything. I heard the front door close when I was getting out of the shower, I just figured it was Bri taking out the garbage, but when I came out I saw her laying on the floor." She shook her head as if she was trying to erase the memory. "I tried to get her to come to. I saw the bump on her head and blood. I remembered the front door closing." She was shaking the entire time she recalled the events. "I freaked and called the cops."

"Where's Bri?" I asked. Now that we knew Katie wasn't physically hurt, I put all my focus on Bri.

"She's in her room with a ME."

"She okay?"

"She says she is, but, well, you know how she is."

I nodded, knowing all too well. "You can stay with her right?" I asked Kev.

"Of course."

I took off for Bri's room, trying to calm myself down. I couldn't believe it. Why would anyone break in, but nowt take anything? Why would they hurt her?

As I rounded the corner and looked into her room, I flinched a little seeing her sitting on her bed, legs crossed. She looked like a little girl. I felt a twinge in my stomach when I saw a big red-purple bruise visible just above her left eyebrow. I knew right then and there that I was going to find whoever did this. I didn't want to think she knew the person who did this, but it didn't look like a random B&E.

"Javi?" She asked, when the ME stopped shining a light in her eyes.

"Hey," I walked in. "You doing okay?"

She nodded. "Just some bruising. No concussion, right?" She asked the ME.

"Yes, but that doesn't mean you are fine. You might still feel a little off, so just try and relax."

Bri nodded. "Of course."

The ME gave me a nod before leaving the room.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, patting the bed for me to sit.

"Kev got a call from a officer."

She sighed and nodded.

"You okay?" I sat down next to her.

"Of course. I'm just happy Katie wasn't hurt."

"Yeah, I know." I surveyed her head. "Looks pretty bad."

"It doesn't make me look tough?" She joked.

"Makes you look like you got a hit to the head." I sighed. "Do you remember what happened?"

"I gave Officer Jensen my statement. You can probably read it."

"I know." I nodded. "I know, but I want to hear it from you."

She resituated herself to face me. "Katie was in the shower, so I decided to straighten up in my room. I made my bed, put away some clothes," She stopped for a moment and then put her hand on her neck, like she was feeling for something.

"What?"

She got up and walked over to the stand by her bed and started searching. "Oh my God." She looked on the floor and checked the pockets of the hoodie she was wearing. It was the one I bought her a few months ago. "No. No. No." She repeated and then looked at me. "It's gone."

"What's gone?"

"My chain. Dad's chain." She clarified.

I squinted. "Are you sure?"

"I was wearing it. And now it's gone." She left the room and I quickly got up and followed her. I suddenly remembered the chain she was referring too. Sam wore it everyday. Not too long after Sam's death, Bri started wearing it too. This wasn't good.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Brianna's POV<strong>

"Katie!" I called out walking into the living room. She was sitting on the couch with Kevin. I couldn't really pay too much attention to the fact that he was sitting there or to the fact that he made a pained face, much like Javi, when he saw my face. I had bigger things on my mind at the moment to be concerned over.

"What?" She asked sitting up. She must have known that I was upset.

"Do you know where dad's chain is? I was wearing it this morning, but now I can't find it. Did someone take it off of me?" I knew I was talking in a rush, but I couldn't help it. It was all I could think about. I couldn't have lost it. I just couldn't have.

"I'm not sure." She got up and put her hand on my arm. "Calm down, we'll find it."

"Why don't I go ask and see what I can find out?" Kevin volunteered.

"Thanks." I said, trying to put on my best smile. I failed miserably. Kevin patted my shoulder as he walked past us.

"Stupid question. Are you sure you were wearing it? It isn't just in your room somewhere?" Katie asked.

I shook my head. "No. I'm sure. I was cleaning my room, and I walked over to the nightstand and put it on. That's when I heard a noise coming from the living room. I thought it was you." I pointed to Katie. " I don't remember anything after that." I sighed and started to feel dizzy. Katie and Javi both reached out to my as I started to stumble.

"Take a seat, Bri." Javi said and I nodded.

I sat down on the couch and leaned my head against the cushion starting to feel sick. "It doesn't make sense." I sighed again. "Why would someone break in and hit me over the head to steal the chain. It's not worth anything. Dad said it just had sentimental value."

"I don't know." Katie rubbed my arm. "Don't worry. Just relax."

"Katie, someone broke into our home and stole dad's chain. How am I supposed to relax!" I nearly screamed then bit my tongue. "I'm sorry." I closed my eyes as I apologized. This wasn't her fault.

"It's okay."

My eyes opened when I felt Javi grab my hand. He had never held my hand before. Was he trying to comfort me? He lightly squeezed it and I did the same. I wasn't sure why.

"Well, I asked around and nobody collected anything." Kevin returned and I groaned upon hearing the bad news.

"Why would someone steal it?"

"I don't know." Kevin replied eyeing Javi and I holding hands. Almost immediately Javi and I let go. "They might have thought it was worth something. We can check around the area to see if any pawn shops may have it." He suggested.

"Well if they wanted money why not go after our laptops or the TV or any of our other jewelry?"

Neither Kevin nor Javi had answers for me. "Whoever did this, they probably aren't pro's. Don't worry, you'll get it back." Javi said in firm voice.

"I hope you're right." I sighed and sat up. This whole day had been stressful. Waking up from a nightmare and entering another one. Was I cursed or what?

"So I'm guessing no game tonight?" Javi asked, breaking some of the tension.

"No game." I confirmed. I stood up. "Thanks for coming by guys. It means an awful lot, but I think we are okay for the moment." I started to gesture for them to go, but I noticed Javi shaking his head.

"No."

"What are you saying no to?"

"We will leave, but you two are coming with us."

"Why?" I asked.

"We don't know who broke in or why, so until we do, I want you and Katie out of here."

"Javi, where are we going to go?"

"My place."

"What?"

"I got a big enough bed for the two of you and it is still close to the diner, so it works out perfectly."

"I agree." Kevin jumped in. "Why don't you guys just pack some clothes and go to Javi's. It's safer there."

"Seriously?" I asked to Javi.

He nodded. "It's an order."

I sighed. Javi was probably more stubborn than I was. I had a feeling he was going to get his way.

"Do you want to stay here or not?" I asked Katie.

She glanced around. "No." She shook her head. "I feel uneasy here. I feel exposed in a way."

I nodded. Well that settled it. "Okay," I looked at Javi. "You win."

A smirk covered his face as I walked towards my room.


	5. Chapter 5

I wasn't exactly ecstatic to be staying at Javi's. It was a nice offer for him to make, but it made me feel like a child. Like I couldn't take care of myself. Recent circumstances may have made it seem like I couldn't, but I didn't see the need to stay somewhere else. If I ranaway, wasn't that letting the intruder win. 'They already won.' I reminded myself. I would have argued with Javi all day and night, if Katie hadn't said she felt uneasy staying there.

"Everything okay?" Javi asked leaning against the bedroom door frame. I had been unpacking clothes.

"I'm okay. Kind of have a headache."

"I bet." He moved closer. "Can I take a look?" He gestured to my head.

I sighed. "Yeah, sure." I put down the shirt that was in my hand and turned to face him.

He moved a little closer and carefully moved my hair out of the way. I saw the same look he had given me, when he first saw the bruise. He looked disgusted.

"I can't believe this happened." He said still surveying my face.

"I can." I muttered.

"What?"

"I have bad luck. The hits have been coming since I was 5."

He looked me in the eyes. His facial expression softened. "You are smart, brave, kind, generous, funny..." He stopped and shook his head. "You have Katie, myself, Kev, Carmen and countless others at the 12th. You have a lot of people in your life who love and care about you. I wouldn't say that was bad luck."

I processed what he said. Was it true? Were I all of those things? Did I have those people? I looked down to see that he had grabbed my hand, just like he had done earlier. "I can understand why you think you have bad luck, but I think with all the love and support you have around you at all times, it kind of balances out."

"I know I have people. I know things could be worse, but I just feel..."

"What?"

"I feel like I am cursed."

He looked like he was trying to fight back a laugh.

"What?"

"Cursed?" He questioned with that look of pure amusement on his face.

"Yes."

"Lay it on me." He said sitting on the bed and pulling me with him. "How are you cursed?"

"You really want to know?"

He nodded. I took a deep breathe and tried to figure out where to start.

"My mom ditched us, dad was killed and his killer is still out there, I don't have many friends, I have a boyfriend who won't return my calls, Katie doesn't feel safe, my apartment got broken into and I got hit over the head, and last but not least I lost something very important to me after getting hit over the head." I listed and then realized I shouldn't be telling him about these things. I was just being petty. "You know what? Forget it. I'm just complaining. You shouldn't have to listen to that."

"I asked, remember?" He looked at me with a small smile.

I nodded. "Still. You shouldn't have to hear all my petty problems." I felt embarrassed and only had myself to blame. I stood up and stretched. Today was a nightmare.

"I have a question." He asked after a few seconds.

"What's that?" I asked.

"What's the scar on your stomach?"

"What?" Where'd that come from?

"I saw it, when you stretched."

'Shit!' I bit my lip. "You saw?"

He nodded. "Tell me."

"It's not that bad, don't worry."

"I still want to hear how it got there. You are staying at my place, so you have to play by my rules."

"It's funny how intimidating you think you are." I kind of laughed.

"Just answer the question."

I sighed. "Why not? Nothing else has gone my way today. I was in an accident when I was 8. I was at friends house. We were running around the house, pretending to be chased by monsters." I saw a light smile play on his lips. "We ran into the kitchen and I accidentally ran into my friends mom." I raised my shirt slightly and his eyes followed. "She was preparing dinner, so she had a knife in her hand." His eyes widened when he saw the scar. "The cut was pretty deep and Dad flipped out. I wasn't allowed the go over to anyone's house after that." I felt so exposed, but oddly safe at the same time.

His eyes were still on the scar. "Oh my god! I had no idea."

"How would you?" I lightly laughed.

"How deep did it go?"

"Pretty deep. I had to have 18 stitches."

"Wow." His eyes lingered on the scar. "Sam never told me."

"Yeah. So now I can't wear bikini's." I joked and lowered my shirt. "I feel like everyone's eyes will be drawn to" I cut short when I felt a warmth on my skin. Right where my scar was. "it." I finished my thought, trying to hide the affect his touch had given me.

He slowly traced the scar with his index and middle fingers. I felt conflicted. Nobody ever touched my scar besides my dad and that was only when he put cream on it. I was a little apprehensive about letting people see it, let alone touch it. Despite that, I felt myself moving closer into his touch. The sensation of his skin on mine, was hard to resist. I let my eyes close, trying to savor the feel of it.

When I opened my eyes I found him looking at me. He stood up and I moved back, but just a little. His eyes never left mine and his whole hand was now on my bare skin.

"You shouldn't feel like you have to hide it, you know." I tried to focus on his words instead of his touch. "We all have scars."

I nodded, not knowing what to say, all I knew is that I didn't want him to move his hand. It felt so good. I hadn't expected to ever feel this way about Javi. I guess that's because I never thought I would have his hands on me.

"I mean scars only remind us how strong we are, right?"

I wasn't sure why, but I felt the urge to cry, maybe it was because of how sweet he was being. He was still looking at me and I couldn't seem to look away. His fingers slowly ran over my skin, causing me let out a whispering gasp. I felt like I was on fire.

His other hand landed on my hip. The heat filled my entire body. I closed my eyes, beginning to feel light headed. I was sure it had to do more with him than my injury.

He moved me closer against him and when I dared to open my eyes I saw him leaning in. I let my eyes close again, unable to think about anything else. I didn't want to think about anything. I slipped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer, unable to spend another second without his lips on mine. I wasn't sure why, but I wanted to how he tasted.

"Where's the extra blankets?" Katie's voice rang through the apartment and Javi and I both jumped back. Realizing where I was and I who I was with, I began to internally lecture myself.

Javi stood there for a couple seconds of silence. "I'm on my way." He told Katie. A moment later he was out of the room, taking the warmth with him. I felt both frustrated and sad.

* * *

><p>We decided to have Chinese for dinner. Kevin joined us, since Jenny was working a late shift. I was extremely grateful for that. Having Katie and Kevin present, would decrease the odds that Javi I would be alone.<p>

I had been trying to distance myself after our encounter. We should have never been so close to doing what we almost did. I was so thankful Katie had interrupted when she did. I wished she would have done it long before then. Javi should have know better. I should have known better. I had a boyfriend. Javi knew that.

Stupid head injury. It was preventing me from wise decision making. What was Javi's excuse?

I wasn't really eating, just stabbing my food with my fork and moving it around. I was in and out of the conversations, mostly in my head thinking about the man sitting to my right. Katie said something that snagged my attention.

"So when should we be expecting babies?" Katie asked Kevin casually, nearly causing him to choke on his beer.

"What? Jenny and I are not even married yet, and you are already trying push fatherhood onto me?"

She nodded. "You and Jenny will be great parents."

I agreed. Kevin and Jenny were two of the sweetest people I knew. They would give anything they could to make another person happy. How could they not be great parents?

"We have no immediate plans." Kevin said giving Katie a weird look. "Besides, I already have my hands full with you guys and let's not forget my biggest task." We all looked at him. " Javi." He patted his partner on the shoulder with a grin.

"I thought I was the one keeping you out of trouble and alive."

"I like to think it's a team effort."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, bro." Javi muttered. I hadn't looked at him since our encounter in the bedroom. I feared his gaze.

"I'll talk to her about it." Katie commented. "I would babysit whenever you needed me to."

Kevin stared at me in disbelief. "Are you going to help?" He asked.

"What?" I smiled. "She's not going to change Jenny's mind." I found it weird that Katie was so gung-ho about the whole thing. From day one said had a huge crush on Kevin. Even though we never talked about it, I knew she still liked him.

Katie scoffed. "We'll see."

I couldn't help, but laugh at her. "Don't worry, Kevin." I tried to assure him.

"Need some aspirin?" Katie asked me getting up from the table.

"No thanks. I'm fine." Everyone, including Javi, laughed.

I jumped to my own defense. "If I was in pain, you would know it. I don't need anything." I groaned and rubbed my head. I flinched when I pressed too hard the bruise.

"No pain, you say." Katie muttered leaving the room.

I sighed and tried to calm myself.

"Really, how's the head?" Kevin asked, turning serious.

"Still intact. Just a small headache."

"Have you been holding ice on it?" He asked.

"No, I don't need it."

Javi snorted. "Yes, you do."

I looked at him for the first time and felt a bit of anger that he was making assumptions about me. "I'm sorry, I must have forgotten that you were a doctor after getting hit over the head." I glared at him.

"It wouldn't hurt to give it a try." He tried, but I was already getting upset. Maybe it was just the day I was having, but I was getting really mad and felt like either screaming or crying.

"The ME said, I was fine." I said in an agitated tone.

He sighed. "Fine. Do whatever you want." He gave up sitting back in his chair. I felt Kevin's eyes darting between Javi and I.

Katie returned with the aspirins. "I don't know if they will help, but please give them a shot." She pleaded. "It will make me feel like I am doing something to help."

I slowly nodded. "Okay." My voice softened.

"Thanks." She handed over the aspirins and I took them.

"I'm feeling kind of tired, so I'm going to try and get some sleep." I stood up and took my plate into the kitchen. I didn't want to have to answer anymore questions. At least not tonight.

"Are you sure?" Katie asked.

"Yeah, don't worry. I'll be all better in the morning." I tried my best to smile convincingly as I walked back to the table. "Thanks for dinner." I directed to Javi.

"Anytime." He replied, not looking at me.

"See you guys later." I said goodnight and went into the bedroom, closing the door behind me.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Two Weeks Later<strong>

I should have been more into this. I should have been thoughtless at this point. I should have been going through the motions with a lot more passion, but here I was. Thinking about anything, but what was happening. Could he tell? I was actually hoping Katie would make a quick return home. I didn't want this. Not now. Was that true or did I just not want it with him?

Derek and I had been seeing each other on and off for about a year. After dad was killed, I kept things pretty close to the chest. Only few people I let in. Derek wasn't one of them. We would talk, but not about anything personal. Just talked about random insignificant things. One day, I decided to take a huge step and ask him out. I thought I needed it. I thought a relationship would fix things. That it would make me happy.

Things weren't exactly how I expected them to be. I guess they never were with Derek. It was like we were in a relationship, but one that had a expiration date. I didn't know when it would go bad, I just knew that it would.

When his hand ran down my stomach and began to unbutton my jeans, I acknowledged it and put it to a stop as soon as I could.

"No." I firmly said, moving his hand away.

"Why? Don't you want to?" Was he kidding me?

"Obviously I don't. I did just removed your hand." My bitterness came out.

He sighed and hung his head.

"Why not? It's not like we've never had sex."

"I know." I rolled my eyes and sat up, making him get off me. "I just don't want to do it now. I have a lot of things going through my mind. Don't really feel like it, I guess." I sighed.

I wasn't lying. I had a lot of things going on through my mind. I was having car problems, Katie was becoming a little too distant for my comfort, I was still worried and angry about the break in, I was mad dad's chain was still gone, and last but not least I was upset and confused about Javi. I didn't know how to make things right with him. I didn't even know where to begin.

"What is this really about?"

"I just told you."

"No, you didn't." He sighed slipping his shoes on. "You are obviously going through a lot and you won't talk to me about it, you just keep pushing me away."

"What? No, that's not true."

"Okay, then tell me what's going on? Share with me." He sat back and turned his attention to me.

I knew in relationships that you needed to share and be open, but I just couldn't. Not with him. I didn't feel safe sharing my feelings or problems with him. He was always nice to me, but something told me that underneath it all, he was filled with judgment. Maybe that's just what I was telling myself.

"You going to say anything?"

I sighed. "Things are just complicated right now. I'm sorry."

He nodded. "Well," He stood up. "call me when things aren't complicated, because I don't want to be in a relationship with someone who keeps secrets."

I shook my head in frustration. "It has nothing to do with you!"

"It doesn't matter. I should be someone you can go to, confide in, why won't you let me be there for you?"

"I don't know. I just...I don't know." I realized I couldn't say anything to make him feel better.

"You don't trust me, do you?"

I chewed on my bottom lip. Lying wouldn't help anything right now.

"Derek,"

"Just stop! I'm not going to make you say what we both already know." He grabbed his jacket and bolted out of the door.

A part of me wanted to race after him, but another stronger part told me to stay put and that's what I did. I let him go. It was probably for the best. If I couldn't trust him, what the hell was I doing?

* * *

><p>That was a question I had been asking since long before I could even remember. I had no idea what the hell I was doing? Sometimes it just felt like I was here to make sure Katie had everything she needed and that she was safe. I didn't mind that part, it was just everything else had me confused to no end.<p>

My whole life had been about taking care of Katie. What was I supposed to do when she didn't need me anymore? That day was approaching pretty quickly. I thought dad would be here, so I would have him to take care of. Soon she would be graduating, going to college, getting a job, getting married, and starting a family. What was I supposed to do with my life when Katie had her own life? I wasn't sure I knew what to do. I wasn't sure how to take care of myself.

Was I supposed to do those things as well? Get married? Have kids? How could I have kids? How could I bring a human life into this world? Could I even be a wife? A mother? Or was I destined to just be alone? Chances were that even if I did get married and have kids that I would just ditch them. It ran in the family. My own mother did that. Why wouldn't I do the same?

I had a lot of issues. Who wanted to sign up to be with me? There were only a handful of people who knew me. Really knew me. They knew that I was damaged. They knew I carried a lot of baggage. I doubted any of them thought that I would be able to live a happy normal life.

Things were stacking up on me and I wasn't sure I could deal with the pressure, so I had to get rid of the weight. One of my most daunting problems was trying to resolve things with Javi. Javi, the person who was always pushing me to have my own life and tried to do everything he could for Katie and I, was no longer there. I had myself to blame.

I stopped talking to him. After the accident and our close encounter, I hadn't exactly been the nicest person to him. Katie and I stayed at Javi's for a week. Within that week, I didn't talk to him. Even when he talked to me. The only thing I said was a simple, 'Thank you.' Those were the last words I had said to him in weeks.

I missed him. I missed him so much. Sometimes I would get ready to call him, but I couldn't do it. I would put the phone down and try and focus on something else. Being close to him and almost kissing him, changed something. At first I was mad at for almost kissing him, now I was just confused.

I knew why Javi almost kissed me. After thinking about it, it was fairly obvious. He wanted to console me. It was out of pity. I, on the other hand, didn't know why I was so ready to allow it. Did I want the pity? Was I hoping he could make me feel better? Or was it more?

I shook my head. My life was becoming more unstable than I originally thought. Everything was spinning and I wasn't strong enough to keep control.

Katie was moving forward. Javi had his own life. And I was just here.

I picked up my phone that was alerting me of a text. It was from Kevin wanting to know if I wanted to go out for drinks. He informed me it would just be the two of us and maybe Beckett and Castle. I agreed, once I knew Javi wouldn't be there. I was so ready to forget about everything. Only if it was just for a night.


	6. Chapter 6

**Brianna's POV**

When I put my hand on the handle to open the door, Kevin stood in front of me, blocking me from opening it. "Okay, so before we get in there I think you should be aware of something," he said, shifting around and looking very anxious.

"Alright." I took a breath, "Spill it."

"I lied to you earlier. Javi's in there."

"Kevin!" I swatted at him, but he must have been expecting it, because he quickly moved away before my hand made contact. "I can't go in there!" I whined like a child. "I can't see him! I'm not ready for that."

"Come on, you haven't even seen him yet."

"And I don't want to!"

He grabbed my arm when I started to walk back towards the car. "Stop," he said, pulling me back. "Look, I don't know what's going on with you guys, but you seriously need to talk it out or things are going to get a lot worse." He tried to make me see reason, but I couldn't figure it out. "For all of us," he added.

"Really? How is it so hard on you?"

"Javi's been acting not quite like himself for awhile."

"And what makes you think it has to do with me?" Just because Javi was acting strange didn't mean it was automatically my fault.

"You're telling me that there is no correlation between you two not talking and him acting like a complete asshole?"

I sighed. "I don't know."

"Let's go get this resolved."

"I'm not ready! Not now!"

"Then when?" he asked, making me look at him. "Next week? Next month?"

I sighed and shook my head. "You don't understand."

"You're right. I don't understand, but what I do understand is that you are both acting like children." I was going to argue, but he cut me off. "Listen, I love you both, but you are acting really immature and the worse part is that you both are too stubborn to realize it!"

I flinched, not because of what he was saying, but because of the passion he was throwing into it. I had no idea he was so affected by this.

"What if I go in there and he doesn't want to see or talk to me?"

"I'll make him, because this whole thing, whatever it is, is driving me insane." He yanked opened the door to the bar and pulled me in with him. I didn't resist, because this was a side of him I had never seen before and I was kind of intimidated by it.

When we entered the bar I was still half-mad and afraid, both feelings were thanks to Kevin.

"Can I have my arm back?"

"Are you going to make a run for it?"

"You drove me here. I can't leave," I sighed and he lightly released me. "Thank you," I said bitterly.

He scanned the bar while I stood there, not sure what I could do at this point. I had few options. I could leave and walk home, seeing as how I didn't have money for a cab, or I could stay here and face Javi. I sighed.

"Come on," Kevin said.

"What?"

"Javi. He's over there with Castle."

I followed to where he was pointing. My heart nearly stopped when I saw Javi leaning against the bar talking with Castle. His eyes hadn't met mine yet, and I was thankful, because my eyes were all over him. He was dressed casually in a white button-up shirt and dark jeans. He looked exhausted from the size of the bags under his eyes.

Kevin pulled me with him as he approached the bar. I didn't like where this was leading, but thanks to the new Kevin I didn't have much of a choice.

"Hey guys," Kevin greeted them. I felt two different pair of eyes on me. I wasn't ready to look Javi in the eyes. Not yet. Castle, on the other hand, was someone I couldn't be upset with.

"Hey!" Castle greeted. "You brought Brianna!"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "She could use a night out, right?"

I nodded. "Guess so," I said glaring at him.

"Good to see you," Castle smiled.

"Yeah, it's been awhile."

"Well," Kevin started. "drinks are on me tonight, so what can I get you?"

"Surprise me," I smirked.

Obviously feeling the tension, not only between Kevin and I, but also the man to my right, Castle made an escape and Kevin turned to me. "Everyone's over there. I'll get your drink."

I nodded and walked away. The whole time, I had to stop myself from looking at the eyes I still felt on me. Tonight was going to be hell – bring on the alcohol.

I had known Kevin for years, and it wasn't until tonight that I thought he was anything less than a saint. Tonight he was being intrusive, unsympathetic, and for a lack of a better word, an asshole. He wasn't allowing Javi and I to leave without talking. He waited until Javi and I both were a little buzzed before he made us sit at a table all alone and wouldn't allow us to leave. He was my ride, but I didn't know why Javi was staying put. Maybe it had to do with when Kevin whispered something into Javi's ear. I noticed Javi's demeanor changed after Kevin said whatever he did. He must have had some dirt on him.

"Talk it out, now!" Kevin ordered only a few moments before leaving us alone at the table.

"That man's diabolical," Javi commented.

I hadn't looked at him since we sat at the table. I had to think Javi was just as against this as I was, but maybe by some miracle he would be the first to talk. Or maybe he was hoping I would be the first to talk. Would it be smart to give him all the power, or should I control where this went?

If I had to be forced to talk to him then I needed to dictate how this all went down. Unfortunately, I had no words. None. Not even a little. I both had so much I could say and so little at the same time. Being forced into this was throwing me off. I needed to talk to Javi on my own timetable, not Kevin's.

"How'd Ry get you to come out tonight?" Javi said.

My eyes landed on his. "He didn't take 'no' for an answer and promised free beer."

"He's something else." He shook his head, looking to where Kevin was now sitting. "Did you know I would be here?"

"Not until just before we walked through the doors." I picked up my beer and finished it off. I was feeling slightly buzzed; I knew Javi had to be feeling the same way as well.

"Sneaky asshole."

I lightly smiled, "Exactly."

My eyes scanned the bar. This was already awkward and it was almost too much to take. My stomach was starting to turn under the scrutiny of Javi's eyes.

"How are you?"

"What?" I asked, not really hearing him.

"How are you?"

"I'm okay," I said, tapping my fingers on the side of the beer bottle.

"You're okay?" He asked, doubting me.

I sighed, "Not completely."

"What's wrong?" He asked, leaning forward in his chair.

"A lot of things really. My car broke down, our refrigerator died, and I broke up with Derek."

"What?"

I knew which topic he was talking about. I nodded. "Things weren't really working out between us and I guess, according to him, that I was pushing him away." I shook my head, remembering all the things Derek had said to me.

"No, not you," he snorted.

"What's that mean?" I asked. His sarcasm wasn't exactly subtle.

He lightly laughed and took a drink of his beer. "You have tendency to push people away. I should know that better than anyone."

"I haven't pushed you away."

"Really? Because I haven't heard from you in weeks."

"Okay, so it's all my fault? Last time I checked it takes two people to stop talking to each other."

"Why would I call you?" He spat out. "You're the one who treated me like shit!" He leaned forward, not taking his eyes off mine. "Given your current attitude, I'm glad I didn't call."

"What attitude is that?"

"The kind that makes you a bitch."

"A bitch?"

"Yes."

"Well," I choked back a laugh, "I'm sorry I wasn't a sweetheart to you, but in case you forgot I had just been attacked by some weirdo! The last thing I needed was you trying to pity-kiss me!"

His eyes widened. "What? I wasn't trying to pity-kiss you."

"Then what the hell were you doing? Or thinking? Were you thinking at all?"

"I'm done. I'm outta here." He stood up, grabbing his jacket and walking away.

Did he seriously think I was going to let him go? After all the shit he put on me for trying to leave, he was going to do the same thing? Well not without hearing from me. I quickly followed after him.

"Yeah, go ahead and leave," I called out before he reached the door. "That's what cowards do."

He stopped dead in his tracks.

"Coward?"

"Yeah. I would have expected more from you, but I guess I was wrong." I bit my lip. I knew he was pissed, but I couldn't stop there. "You're weak."

I had never called or even thought of calling him weak before tonight. Now that I had, I wanted to take it back because the look on his face was giving me chills.

"I'm weak?" He asked, stepping closer to me, but out of instinct I stepped back. I knew Javi would never lay a hand on me, but the look in his eyes told me I had crossed a line.

"You're running away. That's not what strong men do!" I pointed out. My quiver of insults was almost empty. I hoped this was all I needed to use.

"I'm not weak." He pointed his finger at me. "I just don't want to fight with some..." He stopped and rubbed the back of his neck. I noticed it as a sign of anger.

"Some what?" I asked.

"Some stupid kid."

Wow. That was cold. It was weird that the word "kid" affected me more than being called a bitch. I wasn't a kid. You could call me a bitch and you might be right, but I wasn't a kid. He never referred to me as a kid. Nobody did. Just dad, but he never said it with the aggression Javi did. I bit my lip, not wanting to show any emotion.

"I'm not a kid," I said in an emotionless tone.

"Really? Cause that's what I see right now. I expected a little more control from you."

The alcohol was betraying me and I was find it hard to stop tears from forming in my eyes.

He saw the tears and I felt both defeated and angry.

His tone softened. "Have Kevin take you home, Bri."

"Make me."

He sighed and walked out of the bar. I followed after him. He wasn't getting out of this so easily.

"Come on," I said, following him down the sidewalk. "Talk to me. You wanted to talk before!"

"Stop it, Bri!"

"No!" I yelled back. "You can't tell me what to do!" I knew I sounded like a child, but I didn't like being told what to do. In a way it made me feel restrained.

He turned around. He must have noticed the attention I was generating around us.

"Please, stop."

"Talk to me."

"About what? You seem to already have it all figured out."

"Why did you try to kiss me if it wasn't out of pity?"

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I just did. Now go back inside."

I squinted at him. "What?" There's no way he would try and kiss me, of all people, for no reason. We weren't strangers. We had a history. The only reason I could come up with was that it was out of pity. That's the only thing that made sense to me.

He came closer and grabbed my shoulders. "The question you should be asking is why you didn't push me away when I tried to kiss you." He tilted his head to the side. "So? Why didn't you?"

I stared up at him, not able to focus on anything but the way his eyes looked. They were soft and so deep. I blinked and shook my head, feeling a familiar, yet odd sensation building up in me.

"I don't... I don't know."

"Yes, you do," he argued. "Let me ask you: if I were to kiss you right now would you stop me?"

That question sobered me up like nothing else. He was looking down at me, and for life of me I couldn't answer him. Would I be able to stop him? Did I really want to kiss him or was I kidding myself? Maybe I was lonely.

I shook my head, "I'm tired." I needed out of this situation. I was getting to get confused.

He didn't say anything, but I did see his eyes glance at my lips a couple times. His hand grabbed mine and I jumped a little at the warmth. Why was he so warm all the time? His fingers firmly ran up arm until he reached my neck. "If you want me to stop, just tell me."

I wasn't really sure how to talk in the moment. I wasn't sure anything coherent would come out, even if I wanted to talk. With one of his hands on my neck and the other on my waist, I didn't want to be anywhere else.

**Javi's POV**

I wanted to kill Kevin when he brought her into the bar. I didn't want to see her. I didn't want to push her into seeing me either. I wanted it to be her decision. I didn't want it to be mine or Kevin's. It had to be hers.

Arguing about nearly kissing her was frustrating, because it wasn't about the kiss. It was about what that kiss represented. Did she know that? Was she scared? I knew I would have kissed her that day if Katie hadn't interrupted us and now I was getting a second chance.

I'd laid it all out on the line for her. She could stop me anytime she wanted, but she didn't. She even leaned into me.

'Now or never,' I thought before pressing my lips to hers. She responded almost immediately.

She felt so small in my hands, almost breakable. I pulled her close, knowing that I would never let anything happen to her. Never. A small moan escaped her throat and my skin tingled.

The kiss ended and our foreheads touched. All I could think was,_ Thank you, Kevin Ryan_.

**Please leave reviews!**


	7. Chapter 7

"Katie! Wake up!" I knocked on her bedroom door for the second time this morning. She was getting harder and harder to wake up. She used to wake up before me, now I was lucky to get her up, without storming into her room.

I went to go get breakfast ready and smiled upon seeing my new refrigerator. I never felt more like an adult than I did buying and seeing my new refrigerator. It was great because, it was my mine. I paid for it all on my own. I didn't know if that made me weird or not, but I didn't care.

I grabbed the eggs and bread and got started on making Katie's favorite.

Today was a special day. Today Katie was graduating. I still freaked myself out thinking about it. It felt too soon. It felt like she just started high school. How did the years go by so fast?

I walked back to her door and knocked, but got no reply. "Kaitlin Lee Hawkins!" I yelled out her whole name. She hated that. Dad used to do the same thing from time to time.

"What?" She groaned.

"Wake up! Breakfast should be done soon and we got a lot to do! Get up!" I turned and walked away. She replied, which meant she would be getting up.

I returned to the kitchen and continued to cook.

About five minutes later she came and sat down at the kitchen island. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she looked half alive.

"Good morning!" I said as she rubbed her eyes.

"Prove it."

"Why so bitter? I'm making you your favorite breakfast and you are graduating, what could you possibly be upset about today?"

She stared back at me for a few moments. "Nothing." She said before walking to the counter and pour herself a cup of coffee. This was something she did only on rare occasions.

"It's okay, you can tell me."

"No, I can't. So let's just eat breakfast and get our day started, okay?"

"What can't you tell me?"

"It's embarrassing." She took a drink. "I don't want you to make fun of me."

I dropped my jaw. "Make fun of you?" I did make fun of her, but if something was truly bothering her, it offended me that she wouldn't trust me to take it serious.

She rolled her eyes.

"Please. I promise. I won't make fun of you." I tried my best to convey my seriousness.

She sat back down in her spot and nervously tapped her nails on the counter. "I've been having dreams."

"Okay?"

She sighed. "Dreams about someone I shouldn't be having dreams about and the dreams involve things that I shouldn't doing with this person."

I tried to follow, but I couldn't.

"Well, what's happening in the dreams."

"Bri!" She whined.

"Come on. We are both adults now, so spill it."

"Sexual things."

"I gathered that much."

A blush appeared on her face. It was kind of adorable. "Kissing, touch, rubbing..." She shook her head, not wanting to share anymore.

"That's not so bad. Why would you be embarrassed by that?"

She sighed and took another drink. "That's not the embarrassing part."

"Okay, well, who is in the dreams, while these things are happening?"

"Will it stay between us? I mean you can't even tell Javi."

"Is it Javi?"

She gave a deadpanned look. "Like I would be telling you about it." She grinned.

"True." I nodded. "I promise. It will stay between us."

She shifted around in her seat like I had a hot light shining down on her.

"It might help to share." I encouraged.

"I don't know if that's true." She rolled her eyes. "Kevin." She hid her hands in her face.

Kevin? "Is that somebody at your school?"

She dropped her hands and gave me a weird look. "Kevin...Ryan." Her hands went back up as I dropped my jaw.

Wow. Little sis was having sex dreams about an older man? Not just any older man, but one that we both saw mostly everyday. One that was dating a woman she hung out with on a regular basis. I closed my mouth. She needed my support. Besides, it wasn't that bad. Kevin was attractive and she saw him as sort of her protector. It wasn't all that strange.

"Hey," I removed her hands from her face. She look mortified. "It's okay."

"How is that okay?"

"Well for one, you can't control what or whom you dream about. Secondly, you are hardly the first to have those kinds of dreams." I arched an eyebrow.

"You've had those dreams about Kevin?"

"Well, no. About Javi."

"Not surprising."

I rolled my eyes. "Before we were dating, dummy."

"He's single, and you aren't just some 18 year old kid, so it's not the same."

She kind of had a point. "Well, I get why you would have those dreams. I mean I find him attractive, which is what I think is happening with you. Maybe you being around Jenny and Kevin is making you see what they have as desirable and well, it's not a secret you find him attractive, so maybe you just want the life they have and it's coming through in your dreams." I had a feeling, she thought I was talking through my ass. She was giving me a pure, "Cut the bullshit." look.

"I'm being serious." I defended myself. She rolled her eyes. Fine. Lets do things her way. "Or I am wrong and you just want to have sex with Kevin." I hunched my shoulders. She went to smack me, but I jumped back with a laugh.

"You're a bitch."

"And you love me." I smiled.

"Only on the days that end in a Y." She smirked.

"Listen, don't worry about the dreams. It doesn't make you a bad person. Like I said, you can't control them."

She chewed on her bottom lip. "So? French toast?"

"What else would I make you on today of all days?" I turned around and placed her plate in front of her. "Here you go."

"Thanks." She smiled boldly and almost immediately started eating. It kind of took me by surprise.

"Big appetite?"

"Duh, it's French Toast." She said with a mouthful.

"Manners!" I threw a dishrag at her. "I'm going to take a shower, okay?"

She grunted and I doubted she even heard me. I shook my head and left the room after making sure everything was turned off and put back in its place.

My cell was buzzing when I entered my bedroom. It was a text from Javi telling me he'd be over soon. I smiled thinking about him.

It had been a month since we officially started dating. It was weird, but a good kind of weird. Ever since that night we kissed, we'd been seeing each other everyday. We wanted to keep it quiet for awhile. We knew it would be difficult for Katie and Kevin to accept.

We made it 3 weeks before being found out by Katie. There was no cover story for him being on top of me and his hand up my shirt. Once she knew, Javi knew he had to tell Kevin before he found out from my blabber mouthed sister.

Katie was pretty understanding about it. I expected her to be upset, but she told me that it was about time I did something good for myself. She was right. Javi was definitely one of the best decisions I had made in some time.

Kevin, on the other hand, hadn't took the news as well. He wasn't mad, but just confused. Javi said it was because he had grown to look at Katie and I as his sisters. Now with Javi and I dating, Kevin saw it as weird. I couldn't blame him really. I hadn't expected things to work out they way they had, but even though Kevin's concerns were understandable, I was happy with Javi and I wasn't going to let anyone else's thoughts or feelings ruin it.

Javi and I had been taking things slow. It was a mutual decision. Javi's concerns were obvious and I didn't want to push him. So, I told him when he was ready, I'd be there. No sense putting pressure on him. He already had a job that did that.

After taking a much needed shower, I was feeling more awake and refreshed. Last night I hadn't gotten too much sleep. One of our neighbors were making a lot of noise and they choose to do so, right outside of my window. The weird thing was that whenever I looked outside, I couldn't see anyone. Last night wasn't the first night and it was beginning to become ridiculous.

While making my bed, I felt two strong arms wrap around my waist. I instantly smiled.

"I love seeing you in a skirt."

I laughed and wiggled free when he started blowing into my ear. "Stop it." I whispered and went to close my door. Katie knew we were dating, but that didn't mean I wanted to put everything on display for her.

"Why?" He asked coming over to me and pressing me against the door.

"Katie's right out there. Plus, I don't want you teasing me." It was always so difficult for me to calm myself down, once he got me too worked up and left.

He frowned. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Sometimes it's very fun." I smirked.

He placed his hands on the door, putting his hands right by my head. He leaned against me and kissed me. It was soft and slow. But like all our kisses, it became fast and rough, quickly. When a groan escaped the back of his throat, I moved him back.

He whined. "Why?"

"Because," I fixed his tie that was a little crooked. "I have to get ready to leave."

He frowned. "When are you leaving?"

"As soon as Katie is ready."

"Be at the school around 6, right?"

I nodded. "You're bringing Kevin, right?"

"Of course. We wouldn't miss this." He smiled.

I placed a light kiss to his lips. "Come on. Being in here with you is making me weak."

"That's the plan." He smirked and I lightly swatted his arm.

"Move it." I laughed.

Half Hour Before The Graduation

"I hope I don't fall." Katie fidgeted around in her gown.

"Don't overthink it and you will do just fine." I helped her with her cap. "I want to take a picture." I walked over to grab my phone out of my purse, then realized that I had left it in the car. "Damn!"

"What?"

"I left my phone in the car." I groaned. "I'll be back."

"Hurry back, I need you to stop me from fainting."

I smiled. "Maybe if I run into to Kevin, I'll send him back." I winked.

"Not funny." She whined.

"Sorry. I couldn't resist." I laughed before walking out of the room.

Sometimes I felt much older than I was. I was always forgetting my phone in different places. I left it in the car, at work, Javi's place, the bank and the grocery store. I left it there many times. It was a curse really.

Walking down the long and dark hallway a strange feeling overcame me. I felt like someone was following me. Maybe it was crazy, but I couldn't help it. Paranoia had been hanging over my head ever since my attack. I didn't feel comfortable with people standing behind me in the grocery store. It was tough trying to find good in strangers. It had been proven to me, that not everyone was nice and helpful. Some people were just evil.

Still feeling like someone was behind me. I slowly turned my head back to look. Sure enough someone was. They were too far back for me to get any kind of description of them. I was already wanting to see Javi, but right now, I would have given anything to have him appear. I wasn't so lucky though.

I turned around and saw the figure getting closer. I picked up my pace and reached the exit. I bolted through the door and practically ran to my car. I felt better when I saw people nearby. I climbed into the drivers seat and grabbed my phone from the console. I had 2 missed calls and 1 unread text message. All from Javi. His text said he would be here soon and he sent that 5 minutes ago. It was a big relief knowing he and Kevin would be here soon.

I got out of the car and locked it. I debated whether or not to go back through the door I came out of or going to through main entrance.

Main entrance won. The thought of walking through that hallway again, gave me shivers. I ascended the stairs up the school. People were going in at the same time, so I felt safe.

"Brianna?"

I turned around. "Yes?"

"You dropped this." A woman said holding up a yellow hair tie.

"No. That's not mine." I politely smiled.

"Not anymore." She muttered. She looked oddly familiar. I could have sworn I saw that red hair, much like my own and those brown eyes before. I shrugged it off and something else popped in my head. She knew my name.

"I'm sorry. Do we know each other?"

"Not anymore." She muttered again.

Before I had time to respond, I saw Javi and Kevin approaching. The woman looked in there direction, then quickly walked up the stairs, leaving me with many questions.

Kevin, Javi, and I found our seats in the auditorium. That woman's face was stuck in my head. Where did I know her? Why was she acting so weird?

I shook my head and decided to let it go for now. Right now my attention needed to be on Katie. I was a little nervous for her. She was very nervous the last time I checked in on her.

"Could you two please stop with the PDA?" Kevin directed to Javi and I.

"What PDA?" Javi asked.

"We are just holding hands." I defended.

"Do you have to flaunt your relationship in front of everyone?" A bit of bitterness flew off his tongue.

In true Javi fashion, he had to press Kevin's buttons. He leaned over and kissed me. He knew I couldn't deny those lips. He tapped Kevin's arm, so he would see.

"Come on!" Kevin groaned. "Children are present and you are making out with one right now."

Javi pulled back and smiled at me. I smirked back.

"Get over it Kevin." He said not taking his eyes off of mine.

I noticed all the people in front of me and discovered I wouldn't be able to get the best view from here. Why couldn't I be 3 inches taller?

"I'm going to move further down, so I can get good pictures." I whispered in Javi's ear. "Talk to Kevin, okay?"

He nodded and smiled at me.

I found a spot closer to the stage and was prepared to take as many pictures as possible. It felt a little weird being here without dad. He should be here. He should be seeing that all of his hard work paid off. Katie was graduating. He would have been beyond proud. I hoped Katie knew that. If not, I would remind her.

When Katie's name was called everyone applauded and I could clearly hearing Javi and Kevin's cheers over everyone else, even mine.

Despite her fears she walked out with a big smile plastered on her face. She did it. Her hard work was now being rewarded. She looked so graceful up there.

I took maybe 20 pictures. She hated getting her picture taken, but she was on the stage, so she couldn't really do anything about it. I took full advantage of it.

She walked over the side of the stage. She nervously looked down to me and we both shared a smile.

"I'm so proud of you." I mouthed to her.

"Thank you." She mouthed back with a smile.


	8. Chapter 8

**Brianna's POV**

"So, what did you find out?"

"You snore a lot," Javi quipped. He had spent the night after Katie's party. He was too tired to drive and I wasn't willing to let him try.

I quickly threw a strawberry at him. "Kevin?" I asked with a yawn.

"The wedding is off."

"Off?" I asked.

"Off," he said with some anger. "Turns out that Jenny had been a little too friendly with a co-worker."

"No," I nearly gasped. "Tell me she didn't."

"Sorry, no can do."

"Oh, poor Kevin."

"He'll be fine. I got it covered."

"How?"

"I'm going to get him out in the dating world. He'll be just fine. Trust me."

I couldn't believe Jenny would do such a thing to him. Kevin was a sweetheart; he'd been nothing but kind and loving to her. How could she hurt him? "If she didn't want to be with him, why didn't she just tell him? Why the hell would she cheat?" I shook my head. How could people be so heartless?

I looked up to see Javi smiling at me.

"What?"

"Just glad to see that I have nothing to worry about," he smirked.

I smiled and walked over to him, slipping into his ready arms. "No, you don't." I kissed him.

I didn't want to get my hopes up. Laying all night in his arms had me worked up enough. I ended the kiss and pressed my forehead to his.

"So, wanna take this to the bedroom?" He asked and I laughed.

"Good one."

"Wasn't a joke."

"Really?"

"Really," he nodded. His face didn't break, so I was starting to believe him.

We made it to my bedroom in a hurry, and he wasted no time pushing me down on my bed and kissing me.

"I'm sorry," he said when he broke the kiss, his mouth trailing down my neck.

"For?"

"Waiting."

I shook my head. "I understand."

"I don't know what I was waiting for. Maybe I was just afraid."

"Afraid?" I laughed.

"What?" he asked.

"That isn't a word I would use to describe you."

"What word would you use?" he asked before kissing my neck again.

My whole body responded. "Right now, I would go with breathtaking."

We both laughed, and then he kissed me. It was so heated I didn't notice we had company until I heard her voice.

"Could you please stop groping my sister?"

Katie was home. Just my luck.

**Kevin's POV**

I somehow knew that things would end this way. I knew that things were going well. Too well. She always had a smile. Always. I knew there had to be a reason she was so happy. I naively thought it was because of me. How stupid was I?

Whenever I closed my eyes Jenny's smile was all I could see. Instead of the smile being for me, it was because she was thinking of some other guy, or multiple guys. I wasn't sure. All I knew was that I could go the rest of my life without seeing that smile. It was a reminder of how I wasn't good enough.

I wasn't sure exactly when I stopped being enough for her. She knew from the beginning that my job had to come first. She said she understood and respected that. When did she change her mind? Was it her fault? Mine? Should I have made more of an effort to make her a priority? Or did I spend too much time with her in an attempt to overcompensate for my job?

"Kevin?"

A familiar voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I looked up from my desk to see Katie standing in the middle of the bullpen, looking almost lost.

"Katie?" I stood up and walked to her. "Are you okay?"

She shifted her weight from one leg to the other. "Can we talk? Maybe somewhere else?" She turned to the murder board and shivered.

I looked down at my watch. I had been zoning out for the last half hour. A break might be nice. I could mope around about my life later. God knows I had plenty of time for it.

"Sure. My lunch break is about to start. You hungry?"

She shook her head. "Maybe we could grab some coffee?" she suggested.

I nodded. It was probably for the best. Since Jenny came clean to me about her double life, I hadn't really had much of an appetite. I put on a fake smile, "Sounds great."

She looked worried. I didn't know what it was, but I wanted to help. A genuine smile appeared on my face. Katie would always come to me with problems, concerns, and good news. It made me feel really good knowing she trusted me enough to rely on me. She was growing up to be one of the sweetest and most understanding people I had ever met. Sam would be proud of her.

We went to a nearby coffee shop in case Beckett called.

"So to what do I owe this pleasure?" I asked as we sat down to at a table.

"I'm having conflicting feelings," she said after taking a drink of her coffee.

Join the club. "What's so conflicting?"

She grabbed her phone and handed it over. "Look."

I looked down at the picture of a small, empty room. "I don't get it. What's this?" I asked, still looking at the picture.

"A dorm room."

I stared at her carefully. "And?"

She sighed, "Well, I am starting college soon." A small smile appeared on her face and I noticed a smile spread across my face as well. "And, well, my friend Madison is staying in a dorm and she doesn't have a roommate yet, so she was hoping I could be her roommate, but that means that I would have to-"

"Move out," I finished.

"Exactly." She snapped her fingers. "How could I move out? You know more than most how close Brianna and I are."

I nodded. The understatement of the year award just went to the green-eyed girl sitting across from me.

"I haven't been away from her for more than a day since I was born. She has been taking care of me for the past 16 years. How do I tell her that I want to move out? I don't want to hurt her."

I nodded. I could see that conversation going two different ways. Part of me knew that Brianna wouldn't make Katie feel bad, at least not on purpose. She would want Katie to be happy. Things were complicated with these girls.

"You want to move out?" I asked, making sure that she actually wanted this.

She nodded, looking sad. "I think it's time to try something new." She shifted in her seat. "I love Brianna so much, but I think moving away could be good for the both of us."

"I was thinking the same thing. You guys have a very co-dependent relationship."

She nodded. "Do you think Bri would understand?"

That was a good question. "I think the bottom line is that Brianna will want you to be happy," I said. "She will want you to do whatever it is that you want. Brianna has been taking care of you practically her whole life. You have always been her main priority. She has given up a lot to make sure you had the best life. So, in a way, she would be hurting herself if she were to make this hard on you. I think once she processes it, she will be able to accept it."

"Really? You don't think she will get lonely?"

"Of course I am sure. She has Javi too, you know? He will keep her busy." We both shook away the uncomfortable images of my best friend and her sister. Good going Kev. Get this back on track. "She knows you deserve to have your own life, just don't be surprised if she has a hard time letting go at first."

She smiled and bit her lip. "Thanks Kev. I mean it. You have actually made me feel better about this. You're really great."

I forced another smile. If I was so great, then how come I felt so low?

"When are you going to talk to Bri?"

"Not sure. Maybe within the next few days."

I nodded. "Well if you don't want to go it alone, I'll be more than happy to offer my support." I knew how nervous she was going to be.

"I wouldn't expect less from you," she smiled. "I should get going. I'll text you later, okay?"

I nodded as she got up and left. Once she was gone, I was faced again with the realization that I was alone.

**Brianna's POV**

I knew that things would have to change; we would have to go our own ways. I just never thought it would come so quickly or hurt so bad. I couldn't hold onto her though. I needed to let her go and experience things, be with her friends, have fun, and basically let her live her own life.

I knew she was afraid when she told me about it. I think that's why I was so strong and understanding with her. I wasn't her parent, but I certainly knew why parents cried when their kids went off to college. It was scary. Anything could happen to her, and it didn't matter how smart she was. I just needed to have faith in her. She would do great. I would just have to face the facts: I needed to start living my own life. The thought made me sick.

That's why I was on my way to go see Javi. Maybe he could help with this weight that I felt on my chest. Maybe talking to him about it would help.

Once I reached his door, I went to knock, but a memory of him presented itself.

'Here's a key. If you can't just walk in, use it. You are my girl now. No knockin.'

I smiled remembering the glee I felt when he referred to me as his girl. I was such a dork.

I licked my lips and opened his door. I knew he gave orders to just walk in, but I still felt wrong doing it. I opened the door and peeked my head in. The apartment was clean. Not surprisingly, but I was used to living in a messy place. Thanks to Katie, that would be changing soon. I frowned, thinking about living alone, but I didn't want Javi to be greeted with a frown, so I put on a small smile.

I heard Javi's laugh coming from the kitchen. I hoped to sneak up on him. He was almost always doing it to me.

When I reached the kitchen I was more than a little surprised that he was standing next to Lanie. What was she doing here? I lightly bit my lip. For some reason I felt stupid for being here. Like maybe I should just leave. Nobody had noticed me yet, so I could easily escape. I couldn't stop wondering why Lanie was here. I definitely needed to leave.

I slowly backed up, hoping they wouldn't see. I almost had freedom until I hit my leg on something and toppled over. I let out a small shriek as I fell. I didn't even have enough time to stand up before Javi and Lanie came rushing into the living room.

"Bri? Are you okay?" Javi reached a hand out to me. I waved it away.

"I'm fine. I'm just clumsy." I shook off the weird feeling and got up.

"I'm sorry, Bri," Lanie said. Why was she sorry? "I should have moved my stuff against the wall. Are you sure you're alright?"

I nodded. "Certainly not the worst fall I've taken," I said while watching her move a suitcase and some bags against the wall. Why was her stuff here?

"So you are probably wondering," Javi started. I looked up to him and raised my eyebrows. "Lanie is having her apartment fumigated, so she needed somewhere to stay for awhile."

I nodded and lightly smiled, even though I was feeling very strange about that news. "That was nice of you." I kept the smile on my face.

"You okay with it?" He asked right in front of Lanie. What was I supposed to say? 'Get your ex out of your apartment now'?

I nodded. "Of course."

He nodded with me, but I knew he sensed something. "So what are you here for?" he asked as Lanie left us alone.

"I just..." I racked my brain, trying to come up with anything. "I wanted to stop by before I went to work."

He took a quick look around. "Are you sure you're okay with this?"

"What, Lanie?"

He nodded.

"It's your apartment Javi." I let out a small laugh. "I don't make your decisions for you."

He nodded, and I still had the feeling that he knew I wasn't okay with it. When Lanie returned to the room, I felt like it was time to go.

"Well, I guess I should get to work." I gave Lanie a quick look. "I'll call you later, okay?" I directed to Javi, who simply nodded. He bent down and gave me a kiss.

"Be careful," he whispered in my ear.

I wanted to say the same to him, but that would be a little too much, so I just nodded and left. Once I closed his door behind me, I sighed.

Jealousy was a bitch.


	9. Chapter 9

When I reached the door to the apartment, I heard Katie's laughter ring out. I hadn't heard her laugh in quite a while. I heard someone else laugh as well. I cautiously opened the door to find her and Kevin sitting together.

The sight of Kevin smiling made a small one pull at my mouth. I hadn't heard him laugh or even seen him smile for a while. Jenny had scarred him. I didn't think he knew how to laugh anymore, but there he was, doubled over laughing at something Katie had said.

As great as it was seeing Kevin laughing, I couldn't help but look over and see Katie looking at him, smiling away. Her eyes seemed to sparkle in a way I had never seen before. In that moment I was able to just let myself smile. To see them happy, smiling, laughing, how could I not?

Katie's eyes lifted to mine and for split second her smile faltered, until it reappeared moments later.

"Having fun?" I asked coming in and sitting in the chair facing them.

They both nodded and I could tell Kevin was trying his best to keep his composure.

"Don't stop the smiling and laughing on my account. I like seeing you guys this way," I said.

Not too long after I spoke, Kevin started laughing again and sure enough Katie joined in. I laughed and got up.

"You two are so weird." I went into my room and decided I needed to take a shower and just go to bed. Today felt extra long. I knew why it felt that way and it made me feel stupid.

Part of me wanted to think rationally. Javi was helping a friend who was in need. Why couldn't I accept it for what it was? Why did my mind have to go there? Should I be jealous? Would Javi actually cheat?

While grabbing pajamas out of my dresser, something caught my eye. Something silver. I slowly stood up. Shivers rolled through me. I didn't know what I was seeing, all I knew was that it wasn't possible. Was this a dream? I backed away from the dresser and stared at the object on top of it, the thing that couldn't actually be there.

I walked out of my room, not actually looking at where I was walking. My eyes were transfixed on the dresser. I ran into the doorjamb and jumped back immediately. I shook my head and continued into the living room. Maybe Katie would be able to help.

"Kat..." I stopped when my eyes landed on an imagine. I wasn't sure any of this could be true. Was everybody playing prank on me? First Javi lets his ex stay with him, then I come home to find something I thought was stolen, laying on my dresser, and now, well now, I was frozen on the image of my little sister and one of my closest friends kissing.

This was Katie and Kevin. How could this happen? Didn't he just get his heart broken?

"Please tell me this is a joke and I'm just not getting it," I demanded. As soon as the words left my tongue, they scrambled back. Katie stared forward, open mouthed, while Kevin awkwardly got to his feet.

I had so many questions, but right now I couldn't focus on this. I wanted to, but I couldn't.

"Listen, I don't want to hear about it, not right now at least. I just want you to answer me one thing and I need you to be completely honest," I pointed to Katie, who looked like she was transforming into a strawberry, by the color radiating over her face.

She nodded.

I took a breath. "Did you find it and put it on my dresser?"

Her head quirked to me, while her eyebrows pulled together. "What?"

"Dad's chain."

She stood up. "Dad's chain? What are you talking about? I thought that was stolen?"

"Yeah, me too, but I just found it on my dresser." My eyes darted to Kevin who was still standing there awkwardly. "Come see for yourselves." I motioned for them to follow.

I walked back into my room with them in tow. The chain was still sitting where I had found it. I was so thankful it was still there and that I wasn't going crazy.

"See, look." I pointed, not wanting to pick it up for some reason.

Katie walked over and just stared at it. "Maybe it wasn't missing," she said.

"Are you kidding me?" I was already frustrated, now I was getting mad. "I tore this place apart for weeks looking for it and what? Now it just appears and I'm supposed to just accept that I simply overlooked it?" I couldn't believe that. I didn't just overlook it. I wouldn't do that.

"Then how do you explain it?" Kevin asked.

Katie reached out to grab it and instinctively, I grabbed it before she could. I looked at it very carefully. There was no denying that it was dad's. I had seen that chain every day for as long as I could remember.

"It's his," I confirmed.

"So what? The person who stole it returned it? Why would they do that?" Katie asked.

I shared a look with Kevin. He knew why. He knew just as well as I did.

"It's not unheard of that it happen; people have things stolen, but later the item is returned," he sighed. "Sometimes it's maybe a guilty conscious, but more than likely it's meant as a threat."

"A threat?" She asked.

"To let us know that they can get into our place any time they want," I answered.

Kevin simply nodded.

Who would want to bother threatening Katie and I?

I looked back down at the chain and put it down. "I don't think I want it anymore." It felt different now. I didn't feel close to dad, I just felt sick. I walked out of the room after grabbing my laptop.

"What are you doing?" Katie asked following me into the living room.

"We need something."

"What?"

"Better locks."

I spent most of the night on the couch and making phone calls. I finally got someone who could come over in a couple days to put on new reinforced locks. I guess we'd be okay until then. I probably wouldn't get any sleep tonight or the next few. The thought that someone was in here when we weren't was freaking me out beyond belief. I couldn't figure it out. Who would take the chain in the first place? What would be the point? To get in our heads?

How would they even know to take the chain? That it meant something to me? The only people who knew that the chain had belonged to my dad were the people I trusted most. I knew none of them were involved with taking it. What would someone have to gain from threatening Katie and I? We weren't special. She was a student and I just ran a diner. Why would that put us at the top of someone's list?

The questions were beginning to weigh me down. No matter how many different ways I asked, I still didn't have an answer.


	10. Chapter 10

Katie had gone to bed hours ago, so I was all on my own for the rest of the night. I lay down on the couch and tried to relax. Between thoughts of the chain and the intruder, my attention went to the almost unbelievable image of her and Kevin kissing.

What the hell were they doing? What the hell was he thinking? I knew what Katie was thinking; it wasn't a secret that she a thing for Kevin, so I could understand to an extent her part in it.

I couldn't understand why Kevin would even think that as appropriate. True, she was eighteen, but only by a few months. He had just found out his fiancé had cheated on him. Why would he be kissing Katie? Was she being used as some sort of a rebound? It didn't sound like Kevin to use anyone, but after what he had been put through over the past few weeks, maybe he wasn't the same guy.

I shook my head. Thinking wasn't going to get me anywhere. If I needed answers, I would have to go directly to the source.

I must have dozed off, because I nearly fell off the couch when my phone rang. I caught myself before my face could hit the coffee table. By time my brain caught up with my body, I had missed the call. It was Javi. I stood up and stretched. I had a few hours to kill before I had to be to work, so I went straight for the coffee.

I was just finishing my first cup when Katie crept out of her room. She looked restless. I guess we both were.

"Morning."

"Morning," I echoed in a whisper.

While Katie was grabbing some breakfast, I texted Javi, asking if it was okay if I came over before work. Of course he said yes. I wanted to talk to him about how strange I acted yesterday. Javi was just being nice and I was painting him as an asshole.

"You get much sleep?" Katie asked, sitting down next to me.

"I don't know. Maybe a couple hours." I yawned. "It's hard to sleep here now that I know some weirdo has been in here."

"Besides you?" She joked.

I lightly smiled. "Yeah." I put my cup in the sink and then looked at her.

"What?"

"About last night..." I started but wasn't sure if I really wanted to talk to her about it.

"What about it?" She asked and looked a little nervous. I shook my head. Not now. I would do my talking with Kevin.

"I just wanted to apologize for being so crazy. I'm sorry if I scared or freaked you out."

She exhaled with relief. "Don't worry about it. It was understandable. Someone broke into our place twice. That's not something you just get over. I think, considering everything, you handled it very well."

I laughed. Now she was trying to assure me. That was a switch.

"Yeah, well someone will be coming over soon to change the locks. I don't know if it will do any good," I added. "I just don't know what else to do. Can't really afford to move, you know?"

"I think getting new locks was a good idea," she laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"If Dad was here, he'd be getting the best security system for us."

I smiled. She was right. "We'd also have armed men around at all times."

She giggled and I joined in. "I miss him."

"I know. I miss him too." I rubbed my neck.

"How often do you think about him?"

"Every day."

"Me too."

We exchanged a smile.

"Well I have to shower and get ready for work. What do you have planned for the day?"

She shrugged. "Probably hang out with friends. Don't really want to be here alone."

* * *

><p>The ride to Javi's was difficult. The shower hadn't helped with my fatigue. How in the hell was I supposed to stay awake all day? Maybe I could have Derek cover for me at the diner. Sure he wasn't my biggest fan or I his, but he was the only one qualified to run the diner.<p>

We hadn't exactly been the best of friends since we broke up. Sometimes he would come to work in a good mood and we were actually able to have a conversation without tension hovering over us. More often than not though, he would act bitter towards me. Things only turned worse when he knew that Javi and were dating.

It was hard to hide it from Derek. Especially when Javi would come in and not so subtly rest his hands on my hips when we would talk.

Things didn't work out with Derek. He could say all he wanted that it had to do with my lack of communication, but I knew more than likely it mostly had to with my close friendship with Javi. I could tell it bothered him, but I thought over time he would have let go of the jealousy. I mean I was underage at the time. Javi never touched or talked to me inappropriately. Derek had no reason to me be jealous when it came to Javi.

I guess now I was feeling a bit of empathy. Here I was, still hating the fact that I was jealous that Lanie was staying with Javi. I didn't want to feel this way. Logically I knew I didn't have anything to worry about, but sometimes my logic wasn't always sound.

I wanted to stop by and show Javi that I was okay with everything. I didn't want either him or Lanie to think I was acting like a child.

After a few knocks the apartment door opened. Javi was still in pajamas. Despite his physique, he looked like a child when he wasn't in regular clothing. "Thought we discussed the knocking?"

"Sorry," I hunched my shoulders. "It slipped my mind."

He shook his head disappointingly. "I expect more from you."

"You need to lower your standards."

"Well," he smiled. "If I did that, I wouldn't be with you."

"You might be surprised."

He moved forward and pulled me to him. I sunk into our embrace and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"So, I heard." He kissed my hair.

Heard?

"What did you hear?"

"I talked to Ry."

What was he getting at? Did Kevin tell him about the chain being returned? I begged him not fill Javi in.

"And?"

"You must be going crazy." He pulled me back to look at me.

I was going to kill Kevin and I was already planning on talking to him, so this just added to the ammunition. I sighed. How was I going to handle this without Javi becoming overprotective?

"It's not that big of a deal. There's really no reason to be concerned. I'm taking extra precautions." I tried, but didn't know if it would do any good. He motioned for me to come with him and we sat on his couch.

He gave me a weird look. "Precautions?"

I nodded.

"What kind of precautions are there for Katie moving out?"

What did he say?

"What?"

"Katie's moving out, right?"

I nodded. He wasn't talking about the intruder?

"What precautions do you have set up for that?"

I knew my eyes had widened. I wasn't sure what to say. "I, uh, just mean that maybe you can come stay with me." I nudged him with my elbow.

"I wouldn't mind that," he smirked. "So really, how are you taking it? Knowing you won't be able to protect her around every corner."

I shifted and rolled my eyes. "I'm fine with it. Really, I am."

He threw his arm around me. "She's gonna be fine. It'll be good to put some space between you two."

I nodded, but it wasn't exactly easy for me to accept. It wasn't a switch I could turn and off. "I know. It just won't be easy."

"I can help you adjust." He smiled leaning over and laying kisses to my neck. I started laughing when he restrained my wrists with his hands. I wasn't strong enough to put up a fight against him. "No getting away. You're all mine," he smirked.

Just as he was about to kiss me, we were cut off by Lanie. "Javi, I think something is wrong with the shower, it keeps leak..." She stopped talking when she saw us on the couch. "Oh my god! I'm sorry," she said before disappearing into the guest room.

"Sorry about that." Javi leaned down to kiss me, but I couldn't help it as I moved my head. He nearly kissed the couch cushion.

"Whoa! What was that for?" He asked.

I gave him a weird look. "Lanie was only wearing a towel."

"And?" he asked.

"And you don't think that's a little inappropriate?" He had to know that it was weird for her to being doing that.

"I never really thought about? Should I have?"

"Let me up." He hesitantly moved off me.

I couldn't make this make sense. Why would she walk around in just a towel? She couldn't have changed in the bathroom?

"Are you upset?"

I snorted. "Yeah, a little." Sarcasm flew off my tongue.

"Why?" He laughed.

"You can't be serious?"

He threw his hands up.

"She doesn't live here. She's single, you're not, and she's your ex. That's why she shouldn't be walking around like that."

"You're jealous?" he asked, and I swore a smile pulled at his lips.

"That's what you took from that?"

His eyebrows pulled together. "It's not a big deal."

"It is to me."

How did he not understand?

"Seriously, you are okay with her walking around in just a towel?"

"Nothing is going on between us."

I closed my eyes. "That's not the point." I got up.

"Okay, tell me then. What's the point?"

I shook my head. "I should go. I need to get to work."

"Bri! Come on, you don't need to freak out."

I couldn't believe he was being so dense. "I gotta go." I walked out, ignoring his calls for me to come back.

* * *

><p>How could I be the crazy person? I didn't understand it. I didn't think I was being too ridiculous. What if the situation was reversed and Derek was staying with me and walking around with just a towel on? I didn't have to be Einstein to figure out that Javi would stare Derek down and make it well known he wasn't happy. Why couldn't he understand my frustration?<p>

I was too upset and tired to go to work, so I called Derek and told him that he'd have to cover for me. He was pissed, but agreed. Not that he really had a choice.

I couldn't help but let my mind run. Mostly about Lanie. Why would she stay with Javi of all people? I believed Javi when he said that nothing had happened between them, but did that mean nothing would happen? Maybe Lanie would try and pursue him? Maybe I was crazy. I would be thrilled to know that I was just crazy. I didn't like thinking of Lanie that way. She'd always been really nice to me.

I didn't want to doubt Javi, but I couldn't exactly stop myself from thinking that with his past with Lanie, that maybe it would be impossible for something to happen. I mean, they had a history with each other and it didn't help that Lanie was so much prettier than I was. She was closer to him than I was. Physically at least. I was feeling more insecure than ever that Javi and I hadn't had sex yet.

When I got home, I found a note from Katie telling me she left with a friend and that she'd be home later.

I nervously tapped on the kitchen counter. I wasn't too thrilled to be here by myself. I felt like eyes were on me at all times. Half of me knew I was probably just being paranoid and there was nothing to worry about, but the other part told me that someone had been in here twice and didn't care whether we were home or not. A chill flooded me.

While trying to think about anything else, there was a knock at the door. I jumped and felt stupid. 'If someone wanted to break in, they wouldn't knock.' I told myself. It didn't stop me from looking out the peephole. It was Kevin. Probably here for Katie. I opened the door even though I was mad at him.

He looked nervous beyond belief. I noticed his hands shaking. I decided to throw him a bone.

"Katie isn't here."

He nodded. "I came to see you."

"Okay. I'm not really in the best mood though." I warned, hoping he might decide to come back later.

"It's about last night."

"Kevin..." I was quickly cut off.

"I know that must have been really strange to see, but I want you to know that I didn't force that to happen."

"Kevin, like I said, I am not having a good day, can we talk about this later?"

"No. We can't. It has to be now, because it has been eating at me." He walked past me and entered the apartment.

"Well, that was rude." I said under my breath as I closed the door.

He turned to me. "Come on, I know you saw it and that it has to be bothering you."

I sighed. "Fine." I crossed my arms. "Are you sure you want to talk about it? Are you really sure?"

"Yes, absolutely." He nodded.

"Alright, so how long have you been kissing my sister?"

"Just that once."

"Did she kiss you or did you kiss her?"

"I don't know. Maybe I kissed her. It happened kind of fast."

"Alright, why?"

He looked down for a moment. Probably coming up with a way to try and cover his ass.

"I wish I knew."

I was obviously confused. "So, you just go around kissing any girl who makes you laugh?" I was sounding more bitter than intended, but he wasn't exactly being helpful at the moment.

"No. Not at all. You know how I feel about Katie."

I shook my head. "I thought I did."

"What's that mean?"

"It means I don't know how you feel about her. I never thought you felt the need to kiss her. Was it just a one time thing?"

"No," He stopped and his eyes grew wider as he noticed my reaction of pure disgust. "I didn't mean it like that! I just meant that..." He shifted his eyes away. "I wasn't using her."

"That's not the way I see it."

"How do you see it?"

I wasn't going to hold back now. "It's been obvious to me and maybe even you for a long time the Katie has a thing for you, right?" He slowly nodded. "If you knew that why would you toy with her?"

"Toy with her?"

"You and Jenny just ended. You are hurting, it's more than obvious. So are you sure you weren't just using her?"

He gave me a look of genuine hurt.

"I would never do that to her."

"If that's true, why would you put her in that situation?"

He didn't say anything.

"It doesn't matter. It's never going to happen again, right?" I questioned.

"What do you mean?"

"You and Katie. You know that can never happen again, don't you?"

He stared at me for a minute, his eyebrows pulling together. "Are you serious? Wouldn't you say that's between Katie and I?"

"Kevin, your fiance left you. You are hurt. Please start thinking rationally here!" I sighed. "Don't you dare use Katie as a way to get over Jenny!"

"I'm not!"

Who was he kidding? "You don't see it, but that's what you are going to do and I can't let that happen."

"Like you have a choice in the matter," he shot back.

"Katie is too clouded by her attraction to you to even care that you are using her! Just stay away from her!" I walked over to the door. "I want you to go."

"Bri," he began.

"Kevin, I want you to be happy. I really do. With that being said, leave Katie out of your healing process!"

He stood in the same spot for a couple moments, then nodded. "Fine." I watched him storm off, looking pissed as he drove away.

"Why am I the only damn adult around here!" I screamed.

A while later I was in bed. I wanted to sleep. To escape everything just for awhile. I grabbed some sleeping pills I got from Aunt Carmen. I didn't use them often, but now they were starting to looking more appealing.

I grabbed two and chased them down with water before going and flopping on my bed. I didn't want to think, see, talk, or hear. I just wanted to sleep. To float away into a deep slumber. Maybe dream about better days. Would I see any of those again?

* * *

><p>I woke up feeling disoriented, which wasn't surprising. I always felt this way after taking those pills. This time though, I felt a lot more dizzy. My throat was very dry, so I wanted to get some water. I couldn't force myself to open my eyes, but I was sure I wouldn't need eyes to get some water. When I tried to move I realized I couldn't.<p>

I was now aware that my arms were behind me and I wasn't laying down. I was sitting on a chair. I tried to move again, but I couldn't do it. My arms were restrained along with my waist and legs. I groaned when I ended up hurting my wrists against the wood on the chair.

I opened my eyes and couldn't see anything. It was pitch dark. What the fuck was going on?


	11. Chapter 11

"Did you enjoy your nap?" The voice was firm and I was almost sure anger was hidden in the question.

I squinted, knowing full well I still wouldn't be able to see anything.

"I asked you a question. I expect an answer!" The voice was stern.

My head was spinning, and I could have sworn the side of my face was wet. The smell of blood was all around, making me sick. I felt like at any moment I was going pass out.

I wasn't sure where I was or how long I had been there. All I could hope was that Katie was somewhere safe. Whatever the hell was going on, I could handle it as long as I knew she was okay. Maybe if I was gone long enough Katie would be able to call Javi and Kevin. Although both of them were mad at me. I wasn't exactly sure they'd be in a hurry to find me.

A light came on. It wasn't bright. I registered it as the kitchen light. I tried to see who turned it on, but I could only see a dark silhouette. I looked to my left and nearly screamed.

Katie was there tied to a chair, just as I was, her head slumped over.

"Katie! Katie!" My heart was beating so fast. I tried to get my wrists free, but I only managed to hurt myself.

"Don't bother. She's out cold." The silhouette came into view. "Her name is Kaitlin, not Katie. Katie is a stupid name."

The voice sounded somewhat familiar. As she came into view I knew I had seen her before. Her red hair definitely looked familiar, I just couldn't place it. "Who are you? What do you want?"

"You'll know soon enough, Brianna."

"How do you know my name?" Suddenly it clicked. "You. You were that woman at the school. At Katie's graduation." I shook my head. God, please tell me this was a dream.

She nodded. "My name is Natalie, Brianna. You remember me?"

"What do you want?"

"To see you, both of you." She stared back and forth between Katie and I. "So beautiful."

I tried so hard to hide my frustration because I wasn't sure how she would react to threats. "What are you doing? What do you want?"

"I just told you," she chuckled. "I know you aren't hard of hearing, so try to pay attention."

"Why did you want to see us?" I asked, still feeling wetness run down my cheek.

"To see what the big fuss was all about. You girls are beautiful, I'll give you that, but...I don't see anything extra special. Why did he pick you?"

"Who are you?"

"I'm the reason you are here, don't you know that?"

"What?" She couldn't be saying what I thought she was saying. I looked closely and shook my head. The hair was the same as mine, the eyes were same as Katie's... She couldn't be.

She left us.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Javi's POV<strong>

"Really?"

"Yeah, I think that would be best., I sighed, leaning against the door frame.

"Was it something I did?" she asked, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Actually, I think it's something I did."

"What did you do?"

If only I knew how to answer that question. If only I knew what I had done wrong.

"Not sure."

"Is it..." She stopped for a moment. "Is it Brianna?"

I simply nodded.

"So it is my fault," she said, standing up and walking over to the side of the bed.

"It's my fault. Not yours."

"She knows that nothing happened..."

I cut her off. "She knows. She just..." I didn't know how to explain it to Lanie without making Bri look bad.

"I get it. Don't worry. I probably should have known better," she smiled and began to start gathering her clothes.

I nodded and left her to it. I knew Beckett would allow Lanie to stay with her. It was a more suitable place, now that I thought about it.

After Lanie left I sat on the couch, throwing my head back. How did everything get so complicated so fast? I wanted to talk to Bri, but I still hadn't figured out what I was going to do about the situation. I still wasn't sure how everything ended so badly. Bri knew my past with Lanie, I just figured she would know it was in the past and nothing more.

Maybe I should have talked to her first. I really didn't see her as the jealous type. Why would she be? I wasn't a cheater; she knew that. I had been seeing her and only her. Just the way I wanted it. Ever since that first night we kissed, I knew I wanted her. Just her.

She was the only woman I had been with that was almost like me. She was smart, independent, and so laid back. Where'd that stress ball of a woman from earlier come from?

I had tried to call her countless times, but she had her phone turned off. I didn't think she was that mad at me, but now I was starting to get upset with her. Did she really think ignoring me was going to be beneficial for her?

"Not today," I muttered, grabbing my car keys. I was going to fix this, and she wasn't going to stop me.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Brianna's POV<strong>

"Do you want to hear a story? It's a beautiful story. In fact, it's a love story."

I didn't say anything. I just looked down at the ground.

"Oh come on, don't be that way. I mean..." Natalie came over closer and bent down in front of me. "It is a mother's job to tell stories to their children, isn't it?" She moved a piece of hair behind my ear. "It's a lovely story, but I should warn you. It doesn't have a happy ending." She looked over to Katie. "Well Kaitlin is already asleep, so why don't we go ahead and start."

She sat down in front of me on the ground and crossed her legs.

"What do you want?"

"Hey! I'm telling you a story. It's not nice to interrupt!" she spat. "Just sit there and listen. Maybe you'll learn something."

In an instant her face lit up. All traces of bitterness disappeared. What the hell was wrong with her?

"Once upon a time there was a princess. She was a lonely princess. For the King and Queen only had one child. The princess wanted nothing more than to be loved. She wanted warmth and light. Instead she was locked away in the fortress. She wasn't loved, only kept away and nearly forgotten. This went on for years and years." She looked up at me and shook her head.

"Years later the princess was able to leave the fortress and mingle with others. She was scared at first. She wasn't used to the company. She met a friend who helped her, who showed her that there was nothing to be afraid of." She hesitated, her gaze focused on something Brianna couldn't see. The gun was clenched in Natalie's shaking hands. "One day the princess was with friends, when before her appeared a prince, the most handsome prince you could ever imagine. His hair was dark and silky. His eyes sparkled like emeralds." She smiled at me as a tear slid down my face. "The prince was smart and sweet. He was kind and offered the princess love, warmth, and many other things."

I shook my head. What the hell was she doing? Why was she telling me this?

"After a short courtship, the prince asked the princess to be his bride. Of course she agreed. The princess had never been so happy. She loved him, completely and truly loved him. He loved her too and showed her in every way he could." Her smile widened. "They married in a small and private ceremony. It was perfect. The princess felt like she finally belonged, that she now had a the life she always dreamed of." Her eyes narrowed and her smile faded. Every muscle in her face turned. She stood up and started pacing in front of me. More tears streamed down my face. I looked over to see that Katie hadn't gained consciousness yet. If I had to be thankful for anything, it would be for that.

"Not too long after the Prince and Princess were married, the Prince decided he wanted a family. The Princess was scared. She didn't think she would make a good mother. She did know that she was a wonderful wife. That's the life she wanted, not a life with children. She didn't understand why the Prince would want such a life. All she knew is that in order to keep him happy, she needed to give him what he wanted."

"Stop!" I yelled, not wanting to hear anymore. "Just stop!"

I didn't look at her, but I heard a gasp. "Why would I stop? How else will you learn?"

"Learn what? That you are a psychopath?" I squirmed, trying to get my wrists free.

"Don't!" I felt the barrel of the gun touch my forehead and I immediately stopped moving. "Just don't!" She moved my head with the gun until I was facing her. "Sit here, be quiet, and listen. Do I make myself clear?"

I nodded.

"Good." She looked to the ceiling. "Now, where was I?" She tapped her foot on the floor a few times. "Oh, that's right. The Princess wanted to give the Prince what he wanted, even though she was very scared. She thought giving him such a gift would make him love her even more." Her eyes seared into mine. "The Princess was naïve."

I tried my best to try and block everything she was saying. I knew it was all a play to get into my head, but it was like I was being blocked from thinking of anything else. My brain responded to her voice and made me hang on her every word.

"The Princess gave the Prince a daughter. A daughter who he had always wanted. The Princess tried to act as if their new family was what she wanted, but she felt as if everything was falling apart. Years later the Prince told the Princess he wanted another child to make their family complete." Her eyes shot to Katie. "The Princess obliged. Two daughters were given to the Prince."

She walked over to Katie and ran her fingers through her hair. "The Princess gave the Prince everything he wanted, and do you know how he repaid the Princess?"

She came back over to me bent down. "Well, do you?"

My answer came in the form of a glare. "What, love wasn't enough for the selfish Princess?"

My head hit the floor after she kicked the legs of the chair out. "The Prince gave all his love away to the two daughters and forced the Princess to leave. He just let her go. The woman he claimed to love was no longer enough for him. He used her to get the two daughters!"

My head was pounding I was sure I was going to pass out from the smell of the blood.

"Why are you so damn special?" She asked bending down over me. "What makes you two better than me?"

'We aren't crazy for one.' I thought as I tried stay conscious. My head was killing me and I was feeling weaker and weaker by the second.

She moved away for a second and I tried my best to move my wrists and ankles, but they just wouldn't budge. My waist was also tied down. There was no way I was making it off this chair on my own.

"I think we have a visitor." She bit her lip before a smile crept across her face.


End file.
